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In a Nutshell

Tidbits – September 2024

Lord of the Rings on dating

If you’re having trouble mustering the courage to ask out the girl you’re interested in, just know you aren’t alone. Dilly-dallying when it comes to dating is common to many a man… and even a hobbit or two. As a certain Jesse Cox tweeted, in the Lord of the Rings films we see:

“… Samwise Gamgee traveled across the world and carried his best friend up a volcano in order to gain the courage to ask out a girl who was already interested in him.”

Samwise did finally get around to it, and his Rosie said yes, and they went on to have 13 kids. But hobbits live longer than we do, so if you’re going to have 13 kids too, don’t be dithering as long as Sam!

Dads rock

“If masculinity were truly toxic, then kids growing up without fathers would presumably be better off than those who have them. But they’re not.”
– Noelle Thea

I wish this guy had won

The new girls' team?

This past election I recognized the gentleman at the door as a fellow youth league basketball coach. He was running for the public school board, so we got to talking about what he’d do when the transgenderism the government was pushing made an appearance in our small town. What would he do if a visiting girls' basketball team included a couple of very confused guys? His answer? He’d get the guys' team to identify as girls, just for the day, then beat the out-of-towners by a hundred or so. And, hopefully, that would put an end to that.

I’ve shared his plan with friends, and the question comes up: would it be honest? I think so, and far more honest than letting the transgender lie go unopposed. After all, no one involved in this stunt – on either team or in the stands – would think our boys are really saying they are girls. These young men would be making the exact opposite point, loudly and clearly, and be protecting our girl athletes too. If we wanted to be even more up front we could have our guys explain that they “identify as girls to the same extent that #3 and #11 on the other team are girls.” No lie there.

We can see this sort of thing in the Bible too – consider how the prophet Nathan used an entirely fictitious scenario to have David judge his own adultery (2 Sam. 12:4). The Bible teaches (see also 1 Kings 20:27-43, not to mention Josh. 2:1-7) that there is a time when a lie can serve the truth. In this high school setting the real deception is on the other side, and the proposed stunt would only expose their lie.

Last year Canadian powerlifting coach Avi Silverberg did something like this in his sport. The bearded Silverberg showed up at a women’s event, and then, according to the New York Post, he “casually bench-pressed nearly 370 pounds,” beating the previous Alberta women’s record by almost 100 pounds. And who held that record before him? A confused guy by the name of Anne Andres. Silverberg exited without explaining himself, but his point was quite clear.

Christians could do something like this and be even clearer. The problem isn’t primarily that these confused men are ruining women’s sports. The real battle is over whether God made us male and female (Gen. 1:26-27). For the sake of our confused world we need to bring them God’s clear proclamation, and not simply the half measure of someone's common sense. Darkness is an opportunity to show the way, shining the light of the Gospel – it's an opening for evangelism, if we take it.

Then and now

“The early church wanted to know 'What must I do to be saved?’ Today’s church is asking, 'What can I do and still be saved?’”
– Paul Washer

Same outfit on repeat

Author Amy Krouse Rosenthal once decided to conduct a year-long experiment that involved wearing basically the same outfit every day – a solid black top and gray pants, with the occasional black dress thrown into the mix. She had several of each, enough to make laundry easy to manage. She didn’t tell anyone about her experiment except for family and a few close friends. As she described the experiment, it seems like she didn’t even know why she was doing it. A bit of it was about how it might be freeing to never have to spend time thinking about what she would wear. But it wasn’t like she spent all that much time thinking about it in the first place. After more than six months of it, she was getting tired of her limited options, and found that “getting dressed was always easy but never pleasing.” Still, she finished off the year. And, after 12 months, here was her biggest illumination:

“No one noticed. Not one single person ever said to me, Amy, why are you wearing those same gray pants and black shirt every time I see you? This information is equal parts humbling, depressing, and liberating."

Humbling, yes, to realize that folks aren’t paying much attention to us. But liberating, too, because it means that as embarrassed as you might have felt today, folks probably aren’t going to remember how you tripped over your own feet. Getting cut down to size can be a very good thing, so long as we remember Who really is the center of the universe, and remember too, our special status, being made in His Image (Gen 1:26-27).

Down low on the Down Under

Did you know that boomerangs are Australia’s biggest export? And they're also their biggest import.

A poem for the upcoming election season

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
No thing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
— Percy Shelley, "Ozymandias"

Hasn’t he heard “Boy named Sue”?

“I don’t like country music, but I don’t mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means ‘put down.’”
– Bob Newhart

Best ads from the 2024 US election

Election campaign ads are too often just name-calling but every now and again they say something significant. What follows are a few of this year’s more revealing ads.

  • A Trump campaign ad highlighted how Kamala Harris has supported taxpayer-funded sex changes for prisoners. The ad’s tagline? “Kamala’s for they/them; Trump is for you.”
  • In an ad for Kamala Harris, voters were urged to vote for change: “There’s promise that lies in change, and the time for change is now… it’s time for hope, for change….” The Babylon Bee spoof of the ad wasn’t all that different: “'I will fix things if you vote me into office,' says woman currently in office.”
  • The Constitution Party ran an ad that pulled no punches: “… We’re reaping what we’ve sown. The blood of millions of babies cries for vengeance, and God hears their blood. We must repent as a nation to avoid the wrath of God for killing His children. That means we must stop voting for Democrats that murder babies by abortion."
  • In a nostalgic turn, the Trump campaign shared Ronald Reagan’s closing comments from his 1980 debate with Jimmy Carter: “Are you better off than you were four years ago? Is it easier for you to go buy things in the store than it was four years ago? Is there more or less unemployment in the country than there was four years ago? Is America as respected throughout the world as it was? Do you feel that our security is as safe? That were as strong as we were four years ago? If you don’t think that this course that we’ve been on for the last four years is what you would like to see us follow for the next four, then I could suggest another choice that you have.”

Thermostat, not thermometer

"There was a time when the Church was very powerful – in the time when the early Christians rejoiced at being deemed worthy to suffer for what they believed. In those days the Church was not merely a thermometer that recorded the ideas and principles of popular opinion; it was a thermostat that transformed the mores of society. Whenever the early Christians entered a town, the people in power became disturbed and immediately sought to convict the Christians for being 'disturbers of the peace' and 'outside agitators.' But the Christians pressed on, in the conviction that they were ‘a colony of heaven,’ called to obey God rather than man. Small in number, they were big in commitment... By their effort and example, they brought an end to such ancient evils as infanticide and gladiatorial contests. Things are different now. So often the contemporary church is a weak, ineffectual voice with an uncertain sound….”
– Martin Luther King Jr.

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Animated, Movie Reviews

Tangled

Animated / Family 2010 / 100 min RATING: 9/10 In the original Rapunzel tale, her hair is very long, but still just hair. In Tangled, these long ...
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Drama, Movie Reviews

Little Women (1994)

Drama 1994 / 118 min Rating: 9/10 Taking only minor liberties with Louisa May Alcott's book, Little Women tells the tale of Marmee March�...
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Documentary, Movie Reviews, Science - Creation/Evolution, Watch for free

Mountains after the Flood

Documentary 2023 / 102 minutes Rating: 7/10 The folks who brought us Is Genesis History, have crafted a sequel of sorts. Host Del Tackett is back, ...
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News

Saturday Selections – Sept 28, 2024

Click on the titles for the linked articles... Glen Campbell: I'm not going to miss you Before his death in 2017, Glen Campbell had become about as ...
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News, Politics

Alberta planning to enshrine right to refuse vaccinations

Alberta Premier Danielle Smith announced in late September that her government is planning to amend and strengthen the Alberta Bill of Rights when the Alberta legislature sits again later this fall. As she explained via a video message: “As our society evolves, so too must our laws, to ensure our rights and freedoms are properly protected in an ever-changing world.” Smith’s first proposed change is to ensure that: “…every individual in our province who has the mental capacity to do so, will have the right to decide whether or not to receive a vaccination or other medical procedure.” But the revisions aren’t limited to vaccinations. The changes will also strengthen property rights to ensure that Albertans can’t be deprived of their property without due process and just compensation. And they also include a plan to further affirm the rights of legal and responsible firearm owners. As the premier declared: “In my view, these amendments to the Bill of Rights are not just legal changes. They are a reaffirmation of the values that make Alberta one of the freest jurisdictions on earth.” However, some are questioning the motives and the real impact of such changes. Mount Royal University professor Lori Williams argued that “she’s clearly playing to in the hopes that they will not call her leadership into question in the leadership review at the beginning of November.” The Alberta Bill of Rights was passed in 1972 and updated in 1980 and 2000. Unlike the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, it isn’t a constitutional document, so it is easily alterable. That means that even while other bills and policies in the province are supposed to align with the Alberta Bill of Rights, the legislature can as easily override the Bill of Rights as they can amend it. This highlights the differences between the rights God gives vs. rights from the State. As well motivated as the premier’s efforts might be, if the New Democrats win the next election, they could quickly take these new “rights” away. In contrast, God grants irrevocable rights via the prohibitions in His 10 Commandments – for example, by banning murder and theft He gives a right to life and property. These rights may still be violated by sinful man, but they can never be erased. Both the Alberta Bill of Rights and the Canadian Charter pay lip service to this truth by recognizing in their preambles that the rights they seek to recognize are founded on the supremacy of God. Picture credit: Screenshot from a Sept. 24 post to x.com/ABDanielleSmith...

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Dying Well

Will you die well?

We spend a lot of time preparing for things. Every day we prepare for school, work, or whatever else may be on our plate. We ensure we brush our teeth, get dressed, are well nourished, and aware of what is on our calendar. We fill our vehicles with fuel and ensure they still have insurance. We like to be prepared, especially if something big is coming our way. But something really big is coming our way, any moment now, and many of us aren’t actually prepared for it. You are going to die. Are you ready to die? More than that, will you die well? When we face things we don’t like, our western culture tends to resort to one of two methods. The first is to minimize it, living as if it isn’t a big deal, and the second is to try and control the situation. Evasion #1: Minimizing In recent decades, death is purposely being hidden. The days of wearing clothing to show you are mourning the loss of a loved one has long passed. Instead of being buried, 77% of deaths in my home province of BC result in cremation. After all, cremation is simple – it doesn’t require a casket, a plot in a graveyard, a funeral, a headstone, or even much of a wait. The body is simply “gone” with just some ashes remaining. Funerals have also been replaced with “memorial gatherings” or “celebrations of life” where a few words are spoken, pictures shared, and some drinks are poured. During and post-Covid, even many of these empty practices have been abandoned. With fewer children and broken families, many Canadians are approaching death realizing that they won’t be leaving much of a hole in anyone’s lives. Sure enough, when they die their rooms are emptied, the walls are painted, and the next tenant moves in shortly after. Did anyone even notice? We can point to culture, but how are we preparing for the prospect of our own deaths? A former pastor of mine shared that he prefers to preach at a funeral over a wedding. At a funeral people are usually listening – thirsty souls needing spiritual water. At a wedding most people are distracted, waiting for the message to wrap up so we can carry on with the other plans. The problem is that much of our lives can be characterized by distractions from what really matters. When it is our funeral, we won’t have any time left to pay attention. We are either ready or we aren’t. Evasion #2: Pretending to be in control Since humanity is not able to escape death, it is becoming common to do what we can to control it by ending life on our own terms. Since “assisted death” or MAiD was legalized in 2016, the numbers have jumped as much as 30 percent each year since. Well over 50,000 Canadians have already been killed this way. The National Post recently shared the story of Dr. Ellen Wiebe, who grew up in a Christian home and has killed over 400 people in BC. She calls her work “incredibly rewarding” stating that “it’s the last thing I’ll give up.” Why is it so important? “It’s about honouring people’s wishes, empowering people to have control over their own lives.” Again, Christians can face the same temptation, in at least two ways. First, many religious leaders claim that “MAiD” is a blessing to be embraced, as it allows people to die without facing more pain. And, without “assisted death” even being considered, other Christians do everything they can to fight against God’s clear plan to let our earthly life come to an end. We seek to control our death through every medical option available, or by becoming bitter at God for interfering with our hopes and plans. Dying well God has made it clear to us that minimizing death, or trying to control it, are both foolish. Since our first parents ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, death has been unavoidable (Gen. 2:17). And even if a doctor and the government are willing to end our lives, every one of us will still stand before God to give an account (2 Cor. 5:10-11). So if we want to live and die well, we need to understand life and death from God’s perspective, not our own. The Apostle Paul gives us the answer so beautifully in Ephesians 1 and 2. I urge you to stop reading this article and go to your Bible to Ephesians 1:1-2:10 right now. It will likely be some of the most valuable time of your day. Did you notice how many times Paul wrote about being “in Christ” and “in Him”? What God makes very plain to us in these verses is that if we want to die well, we need to die in Christ. Left to ourselves, death will have the victory over us. It doesn’t matter if we attended a Reformed church all our lives, were well respected by others, and are surrounded by a large and loving family. As Paul shares in Ephesians 2:1: “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked... following the prince of the power of the air...” We were dead, even if our hearts were still beating. Thankfully the message doesn’t stop there. In verses 4-8 we hear the Gospel. Let it sink in: “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ – by grace you have been saved – and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God...” When we die in Christ we are saved from eternal death by Christ’s death, and can look forward to being raised to eternal life, just as Christ did. That is why, in his letter to the Philippians Paul was able to testify, “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21). As Pastor Jonathan Parnell shared in his article "Die Well" on DesiringGod.org “Death is gain because when all is lost, we still have all we ever really wanted, and now we have him in a deeper, richer experience that, as the apostle Paul says, is ‘far better’ (Philippians 1:23).” To live in Christ means to surrender everything to Him. Not control, or fight or hide, but surrender. “I am not my own but belong, in body and soul, to my faithful Savior Jesus Christ” (Heidelberg Catechism, Lord’s Day 1). Paradoxically, living well means dying to ourselves – even dying everyday (1 Cor. 15:31), so that we can experience abundant life – eternal life in Christ. Victory in Christ When we are in Christ we don’t have to minimize death, or try control it. We can rest in God’s good plan for our life. This doesn’t take away from the fact that death is our enemy. It stings. I’m “only” 43 but have felt the pain of death acutely many times. I’m not looking forward to experiencing it even more in my remaining days. Yet it makes all the difference in the world to understand that in Christ, death doesn’t have the final word for my loved ones or myself. Because He died for us and conquered the grave with His resurrection from the dead, “death is swallowed up in victory” (1 Cor. 15:54). It is now a gateway to life. Real life. Eternal life. “Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Cor. 15:57)....

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News

Saturday Selections – Sept 21, 2024

Actions speak louder than words During the COVID lockdowns political leaders were caught, with some regularity, violating their own rules, so this just-released clip might not even seem all that newsworthy. It is particularly scandalous – in this undercover video, Dr. Jay Varma, senior advisor to the New York City mayor, and, in his words, the architect of the city's COVID rules, admits to holding a sex party that violated those rules. What makes this notable is what Steven Crowder highlights: "This is a story about those in charge not fearing what it is that they demanded you fear..." The lesson here is that when something is outside our expertise and we have to trust someone else's evaluation, their actions – not their words – tell us what they really believe. What we have here is a COVID expert telling us that this virus was dangerous enough to shut down our church services but not his sex parties. And that's a bit of hindsight worth filing away. How women survive breastfeeding There is so much more going on in our bodies than anyone has ever imagined. Scientists just discovered a hormone produced when a mother is lactating that prevents her from going into a calcium dive – otherwise the baby getting calcium from mom would come at a cost to the calcium in mom's own skeletal system leading to osteoporosis. This is a longer article, and a bit technical, but the gist is amazing. Helping others trust God in the face of infertility and miscarriage (20 min) Jeremy Pray, the author of Infertility and Miscarriage: Helping Others Trust God in Every Season, discusses how to counsel couples facing infertility. How should they understand what God is doing? This podcast is intended for biblical counselors but would be a good listen for friends and family of anyone facing this struggle. Listen to this as a 20-minute podcast or, for those who prefer to read, there is also a transcript. When therapy harms instead of helps The Bible speaks to the value of wise counsel. But it shouldn't surprise us that some secular counseling makes things worse. How green energy endangers us in an emergency How far is your EV car going to get you when a storm knocks out the grid? But a truck with a full gas tank can get you out of the danger zone. And a tank of gas can get ambulances where they need to go. And power the semis bringing in emergency supplies. And etc. and etc. Gavin Newsom signed a deepfake ban so The Babylon Bee responded AI advances now allow the quick, cheap, and easy creation of "deepfake" videos that can depict people saying things they never did or would say. A fake but realistic depiction of Joe Biden could be made to say, "The nomination was stolen from me," or an indecipherable-from the-real "Donald Trump" could be shown talking about how the Russians backed him. These sorts of deepfakes could cause enormous problems. Some sort of regulation would seem a must then. However, when regulations come from unprincipled politicians we have to remember what Obama's former chief of staff Rahm Emanuel said about using trouble to push an agenda: "never let a serious crisis go to waste." When California Governor Gavin Newsom signed a law banning deep fake election ads, it would have been naieve to think it won't be weaponized against his enemies. After all, we're seeing more and more "lawfare" – lax enforcement of the rules for friends of the government, and the strictest application of the law against their enemies, So The Bablyon Bee stepped up to be the first target, creating the ad below. There is supposed to be an exception for satire, but Newsom agitated for this bill in response to a clearly sataric ad against Kamala Harris, so we will see. Got to love the very last line. ...

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News

The IVF gendercide

Critics of in-vitro fertilization (IVF) have long warned that the technology could be used to customize children, allowing parents and doctors to effectively play God. According to a recent Slate article, which sounded like a review of the movie Gattaca, those fears were well-founded. According to the article, "You can have a baby when it suits your career, thanks to egg freezing (or at least you can try). You can sequence your embryos’ genomes for $2,500 a pop and attempt to maximize your future child’s health (or intelligence, attractiveness, or height) ... you can even select eye color. There is a vast disparity between who gets to use IVF... and who is using it to create designer families." Another example is sex selection. Numbers vary from clinic to clinic, but one Los Angeles-based IVF clinic estimates that about 85% of its patients engage in sex selection. However, which sex is being selected is surprising. Historically, when parents choose between sons and daughters – think of China under its one-child policy or Romans who practiced infanticide by exposure – boys won out. Today, Americans using IVF are abandoning the sons in favor of daughters. “Abandoning” is the correct term when it comes to IVF. Standard procedure involves the creation of anywhere between five and 10 embryos that are then implanted either one at a time or in multiples. Embryos that are not implanted are frozen, donated to medical research, or worse, destroyed, a tragedy because every embryo is a whole life in its very earliest stage. Today, an estimated 1.5 million embryos are stored in freezers in the U.S. Why are Americans voluntarily abandoning these boys? According to the Slate article, “toxic masculinity” is a main concern for many women (even those who are already boy moms). Boys are, after all, more likely to be mass shooters and less likely to help break glass ceilings. Perhaps some parents think that raising daughters will be easier. While some have rightly noted that sex selection is inescapably sexist, underneath the practice is something far more insidious. Parenthood is widely seen as a consumerist activity. Children are viewed in the same way as pets or plants. They are objects to be acquired rather than persons whose intrinsic dignity must be respected. For many parents, children exist to serve their happiness, whether to be a parent’s “bestie” or to fulfill their parent’s hopes and dreams. It's difficult to imagine that some of the factors behind the dramatic increase of young females experiencing gender dysphoria are not at work here as well. Girls are thought to be more malleable, in terms of personality, appearance, and even identity. It may be consumerist parents prefer girls instead of boys for this reason. Whatever the motives, the practice of IVF is enabling a “gendercide,” a term used by The Economist in 2010 to describe why 100 million girls were missing in China, India, and elsewhere. Despite claims that IVF is all about “fertility” and bringing children into the world, the practice must be evaluated according to how it’s actually practiced – not just by what it promises. Infertility is tragic, but it does not warrant an “anything goes” kind of ethic or policy. It certainly cannot justify a push for designer babies and third-party parenting. Even the wonderful “ends” of a new life cannot justify unethical means. The lack of regulation around IVF is a recipe for disaster, a recipe already serving up more deaths than lives. This Breakpoint was co-authored by Jared Hayden. If you’re a fan of Breakpoint, leave a review on your favorite podcast app. For more resources to live like a Christian in this cultural moment, go to breakpoint.org. This is reprinted with permission from the Colson Center. Photo credit: IStockPhoto.com / Wirestock....

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News

Sports betting explodes across Canada

Since Canada legalized sports betting in 2021, the industry has exploded, and last week the Edmonton Oilers and the Alberta government were just the l...
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Family, Movie lists, Movie Reviews

A century of cinema for your family

20+ great films for you and your kids to time travel through the last 100 years ***** While most other art forms have been around for centuries and ...
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News

Liberal MP reminds journalist who holds the purse strings
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News

Saturday Selections – September 14, 2024

Why not raise the minimum wage to $100? Transgender thinking has infected economics too, with politicians applying the same wishes-can-reshape-realit...
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Dying Well

The five Ws of funeral planning

I can think of many times I’ve answered the phone at the funeral home and the person on the other end of the line expressed a need to plan a funeral, but didn’t know where to start. They wanted to have the conversation, but did not know what questions to ask or how to begin the conversation. Hopefully, by asking and answering some basic questions I can help prompt your thoughts and ideas about end-of-life planning. Who? Funeral planning can be done by anybody. At some point in the Christian life, we are confronted with our own mortality and that gets us thinking about our exit plan. Christians should give careful attention to funeral planning, since a funeral is a final witness to those left behind about what we believe and hold dear, and is an opportunity for the gospel comfort to be presented to our family and friends and leave a lasting impression. My father, a retired pastor, has said on occasion that he prefers to preach at a funeral rather than a wedding, because those in attendance at a funeral are usually listening more closely. A great question to ask yourself is, “What do I want my funeral to communicate?” Funerals are for the living, so funerals must be relevant and meaningful to those left behind. Planning ahead for your own funeral may be the only time you arrange an event for everyone in your life to attend but not yourself. Funeral planning is often done by the recently bereaved. Death comes sooner than expected many times, and a sudden, tragic loss can cause us to go numb, and feel like we are going through the motions in a daze. A trusted funeral director is vital to help you navigate all the decisions that need to be made and help you to stay within budget as plans are formulated. Ultimately, your executor (or if there is no will, your closest kin) has legal authority to make your funeral decisions. They should be carefully selected and clearly informed of your wishes. What? Planning ahead can take many forms. It can simply be a conversation between spouses, parents and children, or friends about wishes a person may have regarding a funeral. It could also involve a conversation between a parishioner and a pastor about what text, songs and message should be incorporated into the funeral liturgy. Planning ahead can also involve some more practical steps, such as purchasing cemetery interment rights, selecting a funeral home to assist your family, choosing services and other items like a casket, cemetery vault, marker or monument, and even setting aside the funds to pay for them. In many areas you can research some of this information ahead of time from a funeral home’s website to educate yourself. There is typically no cost for a funeral planning consultation appointment and recording your preferences on file at a funeral home. If a death has already taken place, decisions need to be made rather quickly. There could be as many as 25 or more things to decide in a short period of time about a loved one’s funeral, ranging from which funeral home should look after the arrangements to what outfit he or she should be dressed in, to who the organist or pianist should be. Choose a funeral director who you know is going to be a helpful guide through all the decisions that need to be made. When? Funeral planning should be done at your own pace. Any cemetery or funeral provider who is aggressively pursuing you or pressuring you should be avoided. Your funeral provider should provide plenty of information and choices and show a long-term commitment to your local community. Look for a referral if you are new in town. Planning ahead for a funeral is often done in conjunction with retirement planning, or when a family home or other assets are sold, or when conversations about aging and end of life tend to come up naturally. Funeral planning without making a will is like building a chair with only two legs. These things should be done in tandem. The timing of funeral planning conversations can be difficult to navigate, especially when one party is more willing to discuss the topic than the other. But talking about it doesn’t make it happen any sooner, it only helps you to be more prepared. Maybe that sounds cliché, but there is truth to this statement, especially as we confess God’s providence in life and in death. Involving other family members, such as adult children, in the conversation can be helpful to move along in a productive way. Funeral planning should be done earlier than you might think. For those who are married, funeral planning is a mutual gift that you can give to your spouse (kind of like when my wife and I signed our wills on our anniversary). It allows you to make decisions together. I have seen many surviving spouses burdened with making the final decision on all the details when nothing has been planned ahead of time. If you are single, planning ahead allows you to have some control and say over the details of your own funeral, rather than leaving everything in the hands of your executor. Planning early also allows you time to consider all the options, and plan for the expenses. Where? Conversations can be shared anywhere. They can happen while on a drive, over a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, at a family gathering, or while sharing a quiet moment. Somewhere along the way you need to capture the content of the conversations and put it on paper. We often sit around the family kitchen table to help people, whether for planning ahead, or when someone has died. Arrangements can also be discussed at the funeral home by appointment. Why? Planning ahead has a financial benefit, as a prepaid funeral arrangement offers guarantees and the investment of funds that protect the family from any future inflation of costs. Planning is preparing. It allows you to face difficult realities with loved ones, and to say confidently that even though it will be so hard, we will be able to face death, that last enemy, standing on God’s promises, as they are boldly proclaimed to us as part of a well-planned funeral. Having those conversations ahead of time can really make all the difference and set us off in the right direction on the grief journey when the time comes to say goodbye to a loved one. Garnet VanPopta Rick is a funeral director at Kitching, Steepe & Ludwig Funeral Home in Hamilton, Ontario. You can email him at [email protected]....

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News

President Trump runs from his pro-life past

Donald Trump once had the distinction of being the most pro-life president in living memory. In his first term in office, he put into place the Supreme Court judges that overturned the 1973 Roe vs. Wade decision which had legalized abortion across the country 50 years before. Roe getting struck down was a ruling no one had expected, and almost no one could even have imagined. Yet, it happened, thanks largely to President Trump. But in a campaign stop in late August, the former president made quite the reversal. Instead of helping the unborn he pledged to put more babies in harm’s way. He told a crowd at Potterville, Michigan: “I’m announcing today in a major statement that under the Trump Administration, your government will pay for, or your insurance company will be mandated to pay for, all costs associated with IVF treatment, fertilization for women.... because we want more babies, to put it very nicely.” He positioned the policy as pro-family, but because abortion is regularly part of IVF treatments, this is far from pro-family. As John Stonestreet explained in a recent Breakpoint.org column: “As commonly practiced, IVF almost always involves creating multiple embryos, since ‘excess’ embryos improves the chance of achieving pregnancy. In most cases, the embry- os that are created are then screened for ‘viability.’ Those deemed unviable are either destroyed or stored. Embryos are transferred into the woman’s uterus, either one at a time or multiples at a time. If pregnancy is achieved before all embryos are transferred, the rest are frozen, disposed of, donated to medical research, or stored for later use. If multiple pregnancies are achieved, a ‘fetal reduction’ is often recommended and performed.” By one estimate, more unborn children could be be murdered under Trump's announced policy than are currently being murdered via legalized abortion. Roughly one million American children are aborted annually, and the estimate is that another 1.2 million unborn children are also intentionally killed each year via the IVF process. Should IVF become free, as under Trump's plan, there's reasons to believe that IVF treatments could double, which would also double the death total. That's the result of what Trump is promising. Trump's personal life, his frequent crudity, and more so, his promotion of homosexuality and gambling, have all been marks against him as a candidate. So the case for Trump has always been that despite his lack in so many important areas, he was still (clearly) the lesser of two evils compared to his pro-abortion Democratic opponents Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden. However, even while the 2024 Democratic presidential candidate Kamala Harris is every bit as bad on abortion as her predecessors, this time, with his IVF policy, Trump may have managed the impossible, outdoing Harris's body count by as many as a million dead children a year. That would make him the lesser of two evils no more. Does that mean Christians should vote for Harris? Or does it mean that sometimes candidates are just too evil to support, even if they are less evil than their rival? Picture credit: Lev Radin / shutterstock.com...

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Dying Well

Write your own eulogy

Crystalize what’s most important in your life **** My neighbor wrote my eulogy last week, or what I hope will be at least a part of it. It was her daughter’s birthday, and I had popped over with a present. Neither mother nor daughter was surprised when it turned out to be a couple of books, and that’s what prompted the mom to say: “Jon, when you die, I think everyone at the funeral will have gotten a book from you.” I’d like that to be true. I do think birthdays and anniversaries are a wonderful excuse to pass along a good book, and while I haven’t reached near everyone yet, the Lord willing, I do still have time. So, yes, “book giver” is something I’d love to have included in my eulogy. What would you like included in yours? Eulogies are most often written for us by our family after we have passed on, but some years back Dr. Gary North challenged his readers to write their own eulogies. He first wanted them to write up a good resume to detail what they’d already done, and then they were supposed to write their eulogy to lay out what they intended to do. After both were complete, North challenged his readers to focus in on the differences. “How well does your résumé match what you would like said in your eulogy? If there is a big discrepancy, work on both…. There should be more to your life than your résumé. If there isn't, start working on improving your eulogy. Then work backward.” This talk of dying is all about bringing focus to how we can live out our purpose. God created us to glorify Him, and to best do that we need follow just two commands: to first love God with all our heart, soul, and mind, and second, to love our neighbor as ourself (Matt. 22:37-39). So writing a eulogy is really just casting our eyes to the future to see how we might go about loving God and Man. Write it when you’re young While North’s proposal was an exercise aimed at everyone, there’s distinct benefits for young and old. Young people writing eulogies? Yes, because there’s benefit in asking, “How would I like to be remembered?” sooner rather than later. The earlier we get to it, the more time we’ll have to live out whatever goals we set. Like to be remembered as a generous donor to missions and Christian schooling? That might be achievable if you start charting this course in your teens. Would you love to be known as a nurturing parent? Best to write that down long before your kids move out. Want to be called a doting grandmother to dozens? It’s more realistic if you’re busy having, and loving, your own large family now. It’s a different twist on goal-setting, because eulogies don’t focus on our typical aspirations. A big house is nice, but have you ever heard that mentioned at a funeral? We’d all love to be able to explore the globe, but who’d want to be known simply as a world traveler at the end of their life? What priority do you want to give to your job? There are all sorts of careers that’d be worth a mention as your son or daughter sums up your time on earth, but only so long as they were a means of serving God, and hadn’t become a god to you. That’s how writing a eulogy early can show you what sort of goals are worth setting. Typing it out when you’re young is also a reminder to not put off what you can do today, since none of us have a promise of tomorrow. In his book Seasons of Sorrow, Reformed pastor and author Tim Challies wrote about his son Nicholas’s sudden death. The young man was just 20 when he died, and at the time was attending seminary and engaged to be married. While those plans were cut short, his father could take comfort in being able to write in his obituary: “ eventually became convinced that Jesus Christ is the Savior of the world, and that he ought to be a follower of Jesus.… All who share his faith commend him for running his short race well and anticipate the day when they will see him again.” Worth doing when you’re old There’s a different value in writing your eulogy when you’re older. It may be less about setting major new goals – limits on time and strength don’t allow a man in his sixties to take on studying to be a doctor, or starting a pig farm. But new ventures are still possible since retirement may bring time to do activities that just weren’t possible before. I know a man who took up painting and got quite good at it, leaving works that adorn the walls of family and friends. When infirmity took that away he turned to crafting poetry, glorifying his Maker in an entirely new way. But in these later years one benefit to writing a eulogy comes in the clarity it brings to revisions that should and could be made. A young man can fool himself into thinking he has all the time in the world to make amends. But once there’s no denying death’s approach, we can’t miss the need to make the most of the short time we might still have. It’s only fiction, but in Where the Blue Sky Begins, a terminal cancer diagnosis is what gives the main character her clear mission – she’s put it off for years but she’s sure God wants her to ask forgiveness of seven people she’s wronged. The very reason we might not want to write our eulogy at this age – all the regrets we don’t want to think about – is a big reason to do it. Sin has stained all our stories and what we’ve done can’t be undone. But it can be forgiven. Ships may have sailed, but course corrections are always possible because our God is merciful. Just think of the thief on the cross. We don’t know how old he was, but we know he had no strength and no time to offer – stuck as he was, he couldn’t do anything other than profess Jesus as righteous. But that was quite the plot twist, and whatever his story’s beginnings, he had such a spectacularly God-glorifying final chapter it was included in the Bible (Luke 23:39-43). Not all revisions are going to be this dramatic, but we all have sins we can flee from. Think of common examples: a stern mother can’t get back those early years, but she may now have time to craft a different entry as a grandma. Maybe you spent too much time watching hockey, or obsessing about the royals, or reading trashy fiction? Whatever our sins, so long as breath remains, we can repent. And then possibilities will exist still to glorify our Maker. For many a faithful saint these final chapters can also be about etching deeper what’s already been put down. My parents have gotten to a stage where getting out of bed has become an accomplishment, but they continue doing what they’ve always done, showing what a great marriage and sacrificial love looks like. It comes out in small ways, maybe bringing another cup of coffee, or holding hands during Jessica Fletcher but it’s more of what’s been going on for half a century now. It was also quite something to see my wife’s grandmother holding forth on her deathbed, still loving on the people gathered around her, more concerned about how they were doing than the pain she was feeling. And knowing she had just hours and not weeks, she took the opportunity to share some pointed advice because it was clear she had no time but the present. When years and maybe decades may still remain, polishing can be done. A good young elder can continue on as an older elder. Retired businessmen can burnish their legacy by mentoring younger entrepreneurs. Paul tells us that older men and women are to teach the younger generation (Titus 2), and Asaph tells us to share with our children what God has done in our own lives (Ps. 78). So long as breath remains, opportunities to honor God continue. Writing a eulogy in our later years can be about adding on an exclamation mark to what we already have down. Conclusion When I first started writing this article, I intended to share my own eulogy as an example. But if this exercise is going to be as brutally honest as it is meant to be, the results aren’t really for public consumption. I will share a couple of broader lessons learned. Like every Christian parent, I want to make it easy for my kids to say about me – to know about me – “He loved his Lord.” And I want my neighbors to know it too. There’s that old joke that goes, “if the government ever brought up charges against you for being a Christian would there be enough evidence to convict you?” Would your neighbors be able to join in on the prosecution side? Maybe like you, I have some work to do here. I’ve also realized, at least at this point of my life, I can most glorify God by being a patient father. There’s all sorts of other things I can work on too, and goals I should follow through on (like a book I’ve yet to start). But right now, every day again – almost moment by moment – I have repeated opportunities to help or to hurt the mood of my household. I can do so either as a harried, slightly grumpy, justice- more than mercy-minded, busy dad, or as a happier, calmer, more patient parent who better reflects his Father in Heaven. This second option is easy enough to write down, but if it’s going to be a goal and not simply a wish, steps need to be taken, and what will that look like? This eulogy-writing is only useful if it leads to concrete actions. So if I’m grumpy because I’m too busy, then I need to either take less on, or take steps to be better at organization. I know I’m a better saint when I’m well rested, so bed time needs to become a priority. If I really want to be remembered as a patient dad, what am I going to do about it, and what am I willing to give up to achieve this goal? That’s what I’ve learned, but now how about you? What are your friends and family going to say about you when you’re gone? And what can you do about it still now?...

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News

Saturday Selections – September 7, 2024

The importance of "social trust" What can we do when people stop trusting? One common approach is to outsource trust to the government. Get the government to inspect, certify, and license folks to prove they are trustworthy. The problem here is that this makes trust an expensive commodity: licenses, inspections, and certifications all cost money and time. And it also presupposes that the one entity we can trust is our government, and their competence to be able to assess everyone else. The video supposes we can turn the tide by being trustworthy ourselves. That's a start, certainly, but while that would benefit your customers, it wouldn't benefit your interactions with the rest of your untrustworthy society. What this video is calling for then (though it doesn't know it) is revival. Only God can change hearts en masse! It's a young world after all On offer here, four evidences of a young solar system. 11 things to know when Jehovah’s Witnesses are at the door They might present themselves as Christian, but they believe in a very different God. How do we give hope and help to women who struggle with postpartum depression? Two biblical counselors offer hope in this 30-minute podcast that's also available as a 15-minute read. Are the "5 Love Languages" real? Gary Chapman's 1992 bestseller The Five Love Languages proposed that there are 5 very different ways that people express love, and that we could all get along better if we understood each other's primary love language. I had a friend who benefitted from the book when she realized that while she appreciated physical affection – she was a hugger – her mom just wasn't. But, she'd often buy her daughter presents. Chapman's book helped my friend realize how often her mom was thinking of her, how much her mom did indeed love her, even though her mom never gave her an encouraging hug. So, for some the book was quite impactful. But further study finds that while we might have different tendencies, our "love languages" aren't as distinct as the book made them seem. Even my friend's dear ol' mom, who wasn't a hugger, might have appreciated a hug. Why Christians need to stop using the term "same-sex attracted" English professor and former homosexual Rosario Butterfield explains that we should not identify with our sins. She is not speaking primarily to Christians who are simply using this term for the sin they are struggling with (though she has thoughts for them too). Rather, this is directed more at Christians who, though they might be remaining chaste, are claiming same-sex attraction as a part of their identity. ...

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Magazine, Past Issue

Sept/Oct 2024 issue

WHAT'S INSIDE: Write your own eulogy / Why are you grieving? / 7 articles on aging well / Capture the Contrast photo contest results / A tool to count...
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Adult non-fiction, Book Reviews

A Good Old Age: an A to Z of loving and following the Lord Jesus in later years
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News

Saturday Selections – August 31, 2024

Click on the titles to go to the linked articles... Jordan Peterson pressed on whether he is Christian or not (10 min) Jordan Peterson has seemingly...
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Internet

On becoming tech-savvy Christians

Technology changes so quickly that we can become bewildered over what to think about all the new products, services and platforms that appear and disa...
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News

St. Catharines drops censorship bylaw

Just three weeks before having to appear in court to defend their bylaw that censored pictures of pre-born children, the city of St. Catharines blinked and backed down. ARPA Canada took the city to court in response to a bylaw that forbid delivering any image of a fetus to a private residence unless the material was placed in a sealed envelope with a warning label attached to it. ARPA argued that this bylaw infringed the Charter-protected freedoms of conscience, religion, and expression and was crafted to suppress pro-life content. As the court date drew close, the St. Catharines Standard reported that “councillors repealed the bylaw Monday night after an in-camera meeting with the city’s solicitor.” The turn-about is a good example of the importance of legal action, and the judicial branch of government more generally, as a check against the overreach of government agents using their power to suppress justice and truth. Although the federal and provincial legislatures tend to get the most attention, it is the cities and towns (the municipal level) that most commonly violate the fundamental freedoms protected in the Charter. The newspaper quoted extensively from ARPA’s lawyer John Sikkema, who led the challenge. “The real aim of the bylaw was to suppress opposition to abortion,” he explained to the paper. “Suppressing pro-life speech because some people find it offensive is not a pressing or substantial objective, as the Charter of Rights and Freedoms requires. Rather, in a free and democratic society, is an odious objective.” In a separate note to supporters, ARPA explained that a further outcome of this is that “other cities considering similar bylaws will be much less eager to pursue them.”...

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News

The Olympics as Utopian theater

It’s all a show in the city of man. ***** Even after the controversy of a bizarre opening ceremony, the Olympic Games showed why it is unparalleled in the sports world. Just think of the memes generated from this year’s games. In just a few weeks, we got the “super-chill” Turkish marksman, a Clark Kent of American men’s gymnastics, and the Australian break dancer. Far more than the memes, of course, were stunning athletic performances. Sydney McLaughlin-Levrone broke her own world records, but never failed to give glory to God. Katie Ledecky became the most decorated U.S. female Olympian. As one writer described the swimmer, “She is beautifully human. Vulnerable. Not a machine, despite the power with which she moves through the water.” Simone Biles completed a personal redemption tour while also leading the women’s gymnastics team to gold. Also returning to gold was the young U.S. women’s soccer team, now in a new season after the retirement of the grandstanding Megan Rapinoe. And, of course, NBA rivals Lebron James and Steph Curry led Team USA in a come-from-behind win over Serbia before defeating France for the gold. Curry hit four straight three pointers in the last two and a half minutes to secure the win and his place as the greatest shooter anyone has ever seen. This year’s debacle notwithstanding, the opening ceremonies are, typically, a highlight. The drama, spectacle, and pageantry are, in a sense, a glimmer of Eden, an attempt to portray what humanity can be. Vigor, commitment, health, and determination are on full display as the nations of the world offer their treasures. There may be wars and rumors of wars around the globe but, for a moment, the world pretends that all is right. At least, that’s how Snoop Dogg described his experience. But that’s just it. It’s all pretend. Every four years, at the cost of billions of dollars, the world pretends that China isn’t a tyrannical power, that Iran doesn’t murder dissidents, and that Western nations don’t slaughter the unborn by the millions in the name of freedom. It is, in the end, a utopian façade. Little demonstrates this moral frailty more than the villages and stadiums that are built, filled, and then left to rot after the Olympic flame is extinguished. Venues from the 1984 Winter Olympics in Sarajevo now stand in ruins from war and weather. Facilities from the Summer Games in Rio held just eight years ago now resemble the set of a post-apocalyptic movie. After the pride of hosting fades, often communities are left financially broken In this way, the Olympics are an example of what Augustine called the city of man. A city of man is self-serving and, ultimately, doomed to fall away. In our world, progressives claim to promote justice but make common cause with genocide in the name of intersectionality. Many conservatives are quick to take on a religious mantle when helpful but just as quick to drop it when no longer useful. Detached from the reality of the City of God, which aims to serve God and is therefore eternal, our imitations of righteousness are doomed to fail and to fall, often spectacularly. It’s all a show, one that doesn’t take the human condition seriously. Similar parallels are offered in Scripture between other cities. Jerusalem stands, in reality and as a metaphor, as the place of God’s Shalom, presence, and redemption. Babylon, from Genesis to Revelation, is an archetype of human pride, oppression, and sin. At Babel, humans sought a name for themselves. At Jerusalem, God’s name is central. No matter how hard Babylon tries to be Jerusalem, a city of man will always be a frail echo of the city of God. Seen correctly, the creativity, production, and athletic prowess of the Olympic Games points to God, Who created these athletes, planners, artists, and producers in His image. The key, however, is to keep straight who is the Creator and who is created, who is Potter and who is clay. That’s what humans tend to get backwards. If you’re a fan of Breakpoint, leave a review on your favorite podcast app. For more resources to live like a Christian in this cultural moment, go to breakpoint.org. This is reprinted with permission from the Colson Center. Photo credit: Shutterstock / Hethers...

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News

Saturday Selections – August 24, 2024

Abe Lincoln with a lesson on lying The smartest politicians don't break promises; like Abe here, they try not to make any promises at all. Pro-life voters need to watch out lest their votes go to politicians who won't be pinned down as to what they'll actually do for the unborn. Aging peacefully It comes to all of us, that moment when we realize that there's that certain something that we enjoyed before, but we have to let go of now because of age. This is a mom writing, but I think guys will empathize too. An old challenge to old earth assumptions 20 years ago creationists sent coal samples to secular labs to test for Carbon-14, which has a half-life of 5,730 years, and shouldn't exist in coal beds that are said to be 50 million, 100 million, and 300 million years old. And yet, it was found. So either those coal beds are much, much younger or.... Well, two decades later, evolutionists still don't have much of an answer to offer. How to minimize digital distractions in your marriage "Do you struggle with digital distractions? Is it sleeping next to your phone? Watching TV at night to 'wind' down? Most of our time is spent in front of a screen instead of being in front of real people – most importantly, our spouses – who are looking to us for connection." When “helping” kids hurts them Christians should be wary of secular psychology (and any Christian counseling that leans heavily on it) as it understands us as minds but not also as souls. It also doesn't recognize our true purpose and true identity (as created by God to glorify and enjoy Him forever) and so can't offer any sort of corrective to patients confused about these most important matters. It's lack of any firm footing means it's liable to fall for the latest thing, as it has in siding with the transgender agenda, pushing the impossible notion of "transitioning" on already troubled patients. And it also means that, as this article details: "...over 40% of young adults have a mental health diagnosis, twice the rate of the general population. So, the generation most treated for psychological well-being is doing the worst psychologically." More unintended consequences One of the premises behind government-run economies is that people are simple. The socialists don't put it quite that way, of course, but that's what they'd need if their governments were to have any chance at managing the economy: citizen's interests, desires, and actions would need to be easy to predict and easy to direct with just a push or pull of the right political lever. But what this video, and the many others in this series, show, is that leaders is government and industry too repeatedly fail at properly predicting how folks are going to act. And if people are complex, then the best government is going to be the one that recognizes its own inability to know, let alone meet, those less than predictable, desires. ...

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Dying Well

Let the little children come

Children can’t be sheltered from the death of a loved one. But they can be comforted. ***** Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matt. 19:14) A year before I was born, my oldest brother Sidney died in a car accident. My parents and nine siblings navigated the visitation and funeral as best they could. In 1984, death and grief were not as openly discussed as they are today. In hindsight, my parents wished they would have slowed everything down a little, giving themselves more time as a family to take in what had just happened and also to prepare my two youngest brothers for the experience. These brothers were kindly babysat by a lady from their church during the visitation and funeral. But now, as grown adults and parents themselves, they still have clear memories of that time and they wish they had been included in the funeral events. Ten years later, when I was eight years old, we lost my brother Justin in a car accident as well. This time, as siblings, we were able to experience things together as much as we wished to be included. Not everyone wanted to go to the accident site, but some of us did. There wasn’t a question of whether we were too young to attend his visitation and funeral; we all attended. From the oldest to the youngest, we shook hands with hundreds of people who came out from our church community to support us. My brother Reuben, who was 11, and I might have taken breaks to run around the funeral home for a bit, even getting in trouble from the funeral director just once. Sidney, Justin, and Jason, three of Diane’s siblings who died young. I share this to be realistic. I strongly believe that children need to be included in all family events in an age-appropriate manner. This starts with being truthful about what has happened. “Grandpa has died, and his soul has gone to heaven to be with Jesus.” We need to steer away from terms like sleeping or resting. Not being honest with a child can cause confusion and even unnecessary fear of what death actually is. Telling them they cannot see their loved one in the casket because “it is not appropriate for kids” only makes their imagination run wild, potentially leading to real fear and avoidance of death or funeral homes in adulthood. I know adults who were made to fear funeral homes and caskets as children, and now they struggle to attend visitations and funerals to support their own friends and church communities. This is unfortunate, as death is a part of life, as God speaks of this in Ecclesiastes 3:1-2: “To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted.” In 2014, we lost my brother Jason to cancer at 45 years old. Now, as an adult, I had also been a funeral director for over eight years. This was a different grief for me than when I was eight years old. I had this brother my whole life; he was my friend, and now it was time to say goodbye. Navigating the funeral details with my brother’s wife and ensuring his children felt included was crucial. They all came to the funeral home the day after his death to pick out his casket. They stood in the visitation receiving line and attended the funeral. Seeing their young friends come to support these grieving children was so special to see. I am glad that, as a society, we see more and more children coming to support their friends who have lost a loved one. This will help raise young people with a healthy perspective on death and dying and with the understanding that those who are grieving need their support. God has also made it possible for us to share these difficult experiences in a positive way! “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (2 Cor. 1:3-4) Diane Vanderwoude Russell is funeral director at Kitching, Steepe & Ludwig Funeral Home in Hamilton, Ontario. You can email her at [email protected]....

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