Gentleness: a gift to your family

Do you want your children to see you as someone they can trust?

Do you want your spouse to take comfort in just being with you?
Are you easy to talk to?
Is your family hesitant to talk to you when they are hurting?
If someone in your family messes up or is in trouble are you the person that helps him feel secure and safe, the person that she knows will help make things right?

You want to be able to answer yes to these questions. In fact, you sometimes get angry and hurt when those close to you don’t seek your help. Ironic, isn’t it?

Here is a biblical quality that can help you become the go-to person for those whom you love.

That quality is gentleness.

Gentleness requires great courage.
It is not for the faint of heart.
Gentleness is the opposite of weakness.
Gentleness is part of the Spirit’s fruit.

Gentleness is the exercise of the Spirit’s power. Your anger is the exercise of your own self-centeredness.

Gentleness defined:
Gentleness uses only the strength or force that is necessary for any given situation.
Gentleness is showing Christ to those you love. God wants you to associate gentleness with power not weakness.


Because Christ is gentle. If you want to be Christ-like ask him for the strength to follow his example. Christ does not treat you as your sins deserve. Ask him for the power to love your family as he loves you. Ask him to help you say and mean these words:

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30).

What would your family think if you said these words to them?

Give your family the Spirit’s powerful gift of gentleness.


Jay Younts is the author of Everyday Talk: Talking freely and Naturally about God with Your Children and Everyday Talk about Sex & Marriage. He blogs at, where this article (reprinted with permission) first appeared.

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