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The conceited apple-branch: a Romans 12:3-8 fable?

Was Hans Christian Andersen thinking of Romans 12:3-8 when he wrote this? Perhaps not…. but he could have been.

*****

It was the month of May. The wind still blew cold, but from bush and tree, field and flower, came the whisper “Spring has come.” Wildflowers covered the hedges, and under one little apple-tree, Spring seemed especially busy, telling his tale to one of the branches which hung fresh and blooming, and covered with delicate pink blossoms that were just ready to open.

Now the branch knew well how beautiful it was – this knowledge exists as much in the leaf as in our blood. I was not surprised when a nobleman’s carriage, in which sat a young countess, stopped in the road right by. She said that an apple-branch was a most lovely object, and an example of spring at its most charming its most charming. Then the branch was broken off for her, and she held it in her delicate hand, and sheltered it with her silk parasol.

Then they drove to the castle, in which were lofty halls and splendid rooms. Pure white curtains fluttered in every open window, and beautiful flowers stood in shining, transparent vases. In one of them, which looked as if it had been cut out of newly fallen snow, the apple-branch was placed, among some fresh, light twigs of beech. It was a charming sight.

Then the branch became proud, which was very much like human nature. People of every description entered the room, and expressed their admiration. Some said nothing, others expressed too much, and the apple-branch very soon came to understand that there was as much difference in the characters of human beings as in those of plants and flowers. Some are all for pomp and parade, others are busy trying to maintain their own importance, while the rest might not be noticed at all. So, thought the apple-branch, as he stood before the open window, from which he could see out over gardens and fields where there were flowers and plants enough for him to think and reflect upon, it is the way of things that some are rich and beautiful, some poor and humble.

“Poor, despised herbs,” said the apple-branch, “there is really a difference between them and one such as I. How unhappy they must be, if that sort can even feel as those in my position do! There is a difference indeed, and so there ought to be, or we should all be equals.”

And the apple-branch looked with a sort of pity upon them, especially on a certain little flower that is found in fields and in ditches. No one gathered these flowers together in a bouquet; they were too common. They were even known to grow between the paving stones, shooting up everywhere, like bad weeds, and they bore the very ugly name of “dog-flowers” or “dandelions.”

“Poor, despised plants,” said the apple-bough again, “it is not your fault that you are so ugly, and that you have such an ugly name. But it is with plants as with men, – there must be a difference.”

“A difference?” cried the sunbeam, as he kissed the blooming apple-branch, and then kissed the yellow dandelion out in the fields. All were brothers, and the sunbeam kissed them all – the poor flowers as well as the rich.

The apple-bough had never considered the extent of God’s love, which reaches out over all of creation, over every creature and plant and thing which lives, and moves, and has its being in Him. The apple-bough had never thought of the good and beautiful which are so often hidden, but can never remain forgotten by Him – not only among the lower creation, but also among men.

However, the sunbeam, the ray of light, knew better. “You do not see very far, nor very clearly,” he said to the apple-branch. “Which is the despised plant you so specially pity?”

“The dandelion,” he replied. “No one ever gathers it into bouquets; it is often trodden under foot, there are so many of them; and when they run to seed, they have flowers like wool, which fly away in little pieces over the roads, and cling to the dresses of the people. They are only weeds. But of course there must be weeds. Oh, I am really very thankful that I was not made like one of these flowers.”

Soon after a group of children came to the fields, the youngest of whom was so small that he had to be carried by the others. And when he was seated on the grass, among the yellow flowers, he laughed aloud with joy, kicking out his little legs, rolling about, plucking the yellow flowers, and kissing them in childlike innocence. The older children broke off the flowers with long stems, bent the stalks one round the other, to form links, and made first a chain for the neck, then one to go across the shoulders and hang down to the waist, and at last a wreath to wear round the head. They all looked quite splendid in their garlands of green stems and golden flowers.

It was then that the oldest among them carefully gathered the faded flowers – those that were going to seed in the form of a white feathery crown. These loose, airy wool-flowers are very beautiful, and look like fine snowy feathers or down. The children held them to their mouths, and tried to blow away the whole crown with one puff of their breath.

“Do you see?” said the sunbeam, “Do you see the beauty of these flowers? Do you see their powers of giving pleasure?”

“Yes, to children,” scoffed the apple-bough.

By-and-by an old woman came into the field, and, with a blunt knife, began to dig round the roots of some of the dandelion-plants, and pull them up. With some of these she intended to make tea for herself, but the rest she was going to sell to the chemist, and obtain some money.

“But beauty is of higher value than all this,” said the apple-tree branch; “only the chosen ones can be admitted into the realms of the beautiful. There is a difference between plants, just as there is a difference between men.”

Then the sunbeam spoke of the abundant love of God, as seen in creation, and seen over all that lives, and of the distribution of His gifts to all.

“That is your opinion,” said the apple-bough.

Then some people came into the room, and, among them, the young countess – the lady who had placed the apple-bough in the transparent vase, so pleasantly beneath the rays of the sunlight. She carried in her hand something that seemed like a flower. The object was hidden by two or three great leaves, which covered it like a shield, so that no draft or gust of wind could injure it. And it was carried more carefully than the apple-branch had ever been. Very cautiously the large leaves were removed, and there appeared the feathery seed-crown of the despised dandelion. This was what the lady had so carefully plucked, and carried home so safely covered, so that not one of the delicate feathery arrows of which its mist-like shape was so lightly formed, should flutter away. She now drew it forth quite uninjured, and wondered at its beautiful form, and airy lightness, and singular construction, so soon to be blown away by the wind.

“See,” she exclaimed, “how wonderfully God has made this little flower. I will paint it with the apple-branch together. Every one admires the beauty of the apple-bough; but this humble flower has been endowed by Heaven with another kind of loveliness; and although they differ in appearance, both are the children of the realms of beauty.”

Then the sunbeam kissed the lowly flower, and he kissed the blooming apple-branch, upon whose leaves appeared a rosy blush.

This article was originally published in the May/June 2028 issue of the magazine.
This is a lightly modified/modernized version of Andersen's “The Conceited Apple-Branch.”

dandelion

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Blessed are the caregivers

For they will be given care ***** Although we don’t get a diploma and cap, many of us graduate from the role of caregiver when our youngest child spreads their wings and leaves our home. For Ed and Alice Hoogerdyk, their caregiving journey began in 2000, when God blessed them with their one and only child: Zach. Two decades later, shortly after Zach spread his wings and became engaged to a wonderful girl named Megan, a sudden illness and anoxic brain injury changed everything. Ed and Alice were called back to full-time caregiving. Ed and Alice aren’t alone. Ed shared that 160,000 Canadians sustain brain injuries each year and a quarter of older adults are family caregivers, with projections that this will increase significantly in our lifetime. Although we may have other plans for our lives, the LORD’s plan is sovereign. We then must decide whether we will run alongside the Zachs in our lives, or run away from them. Zach ran hard as a little guy. He’s running just as hard now. A string bean becomes a man Ed and Alice were married on August 1st, 1998. Ed was a school teacher, and after they married, took a position in Alice’s hometown of Carman, Manitoba. On July 23, 2000, God blessed them with the joy of their life: a healthy boy whom they named Zach. Two years later, they moved to Calgary as Ed took on a new role as school principal, and they have made that city home since then. Zach was shy. “He didn’t leave my side,” said Alice. She tried to make him more social, but he preferred to stay close and sit on her lap. Someone from her church reminded her to treasure this time, because it doesn’t come back. “He wasn’t Mr. Popular in the class. You could tell he was an only child,” she added. But he had a caring heart, looking out for kids who were left out. This carried on as he became a teen and then a young adult. He despised cliques and was intentional about spending time with young people on the margins. Although he wouldn’t have put the label on himself, Zach was a caregiver. As he grew, so did his love for sports, particularly ball hockey, and then running. He got his love of running from watching Ed. “He came to all my races, or most of them,” said Ed. “The next thing you know, he starts running. His goal was to beat my best running times.” As a young adult, Zach got his friends off their couches, organizing activities like skiing and, you guessed it, running races. He didn’t know what he was going to do as a career until he met a gentleman at a school career fair who pointed him to the masonry trade. “He went for an interview, and as he drove off all the other guys at the masonry industry laughed and said, ‘That kid ain't gonna last a week. He's such a little string bean,’” Ed shared. But Zach ended up flourishing in the trade, to the point that, when his boss had to downsize his crew from 40 to 5 not long after hiring him, Zach made the cut. Ed reflects that this was a stage where the whole family was thriving: Alice was enjoying her job as a controller at a construction and building supply company, Ed was experiencing a “whole new lease on life” with a position as Grassroots Director of ARPA Canada, and Zach was flourishing in his new career as a brick layer, with a boss commenting that “people like you come only once every 25 years.” That is also when Zach met Megan at a young adults’ conference in Calgary on a February long weekend. The two clicked, and in due time they were engaged, looking forward to a life together. But the LORD had different plans. From full of life to life-support In March of 2024, Zach made a trip to Megan’s hometown of Winnipeg. When he left, he had a really sore throat and was losing his voice. Ed encouraged him to go to the doctor, but Zach didn’t think it was necessary. “We dropped him off , and I still have the vision of him walking through the doors, pulling his little carry-on,” recalled Ed. That was the last time they saw him walking. Zach spent the weekend at the home of Ed’s brother and sister-in-law, but he wasn’t getting better. On Monday, Megan took him to a clinic, but by that point he could hardly walk out of the house. From the clinic he went straight to critical care in the hospital, and immediately needed assistance with his breathing. At this point, Alice was at home in Calgary, unaware of any issues, and Ed was just starting a two-week speaking tour in southern Ontario. Megan let them know that Zach was checked into the hospital, and Alice was able to talk with Zach on the phone. He told her he was all right, would likely stay overnight, but would be just fine. An hour later a phone call came that Zach had just had a cardiac arrest. Alice immediately went to the airport and was able to catch a flight to Winnipeg because it was delayed. Ed dropped everything and joined her at the hospital soon after. The news they received wasn’t good. “The doctor put his hand on my shoulder and Megan’s and told us to prepare for the possibility that Zach may lose his life.’” Ed and Alice later learned that Zach was going through a combination of strep pneumonia, influenza A, septic shock, bacterial infection, and then the cardiac arrest. The following hours were a blur of medical care, as the team worked hard to get Zach’s temperature down and his oxygen up. They packed bags of ice all over his body. “I still sometimes do it where I go to my phone and scroll up to the 2024 pictures,” shared Ed. “When you look at March, I'm at this gig and that gig. It’s all go, and lots of hype, and all of a sudden there's a picture of Zach laying in this bed.” “Your whole life perspective changes in a second,” added Alice. “You hear stories from other people. You don't know what it's like until you have it yourself.” Although their life changed in a blink, their Foundation didn’t. “It's amazing. Amazing how the Lord held us up through all of that,” Alice testified. She proceeded to share how they were surrounded by loving care from family, friends, and the church community. “It was always just at the right time to build you up again.” The nurses and others asked “how are you handling this?” To this they replied: “Only by the grace of God.” In the proceeding days, weeks, and months, as Zach’s life hung in the balance, there were points when Ed and Alice asked the LORD to spare him from further suffering and take him home. Zach was still on the ventilator, intubated, and endured multiple instances of septic shock. Eventually his hand was amputated, followed by both his feet. He hadn’t spoken since the cardiac arrest, and it was difficult to know the extent of his brain injury and how aware he was of what was happening around him. But when they wheeled him off to surgery to have his feet amputated, Zach was very emotional. Through this journey the family kept loved ones updated through a blog, titled “Running with Zach.” It didn’t take long before countless people from across the country were journeying with them, reading the health updates, meditations, and accompanying Scripture verses, praying for Zach and his loved ones. A new calling He won’t let go of his mama! It wasn’t just Zach’s life that changed, Ed and Alice were given a new calling: caregiver. Ed knew very quickly that he couldn’t carry on with his job, as it required him to travel regularly. He recalled calling his boss and informing him that “it's obvious to me that this is my new calling. It's as simple as that.” Alice, meanwhile, was able to carry on with her bookkeeping work, as it could be done remotely. Ed admits that they went through some dark valleys in the weeks and months following the hospitalization. “But when the time came, we had to be up at Zach's unit and be there for him.” And just like the early years when he needed his mom close by, Zach needed them in the same way now. “If he needed to get changed, or any kind of care, he needed one of us there,” shared Ed. When Zach no longer received one-on-one medical care, he needed Ed or Alice to be close by. “So, we took turns sleeping in his room. And he definitely needed it. He would look, to make sure I wasn’t leaving, then he would lay down and sleep.” When Zach’s health stabilized, it took Ed and Alice some time to find a good care home for their son in Calgary, as some of the care homes for “young adults” (under age 55) were sketchy, filled with rough music, rough language, and even drug trading. A successful physio session sitting up in the prone position. The Hoogerdyks found something special at AgeCare Seton, particularly with the staff. “If you want to learn about care from a culture, look to the Filipino culture. These people get care. They just live care. Young or old,” explained Ed. “They love Zach and a lot of them go to church. They talk about God and faith.” Zach also receives great care from the rehabilitation he is getting at the Association for the Rehabilitation of the Brain Injured (ARBI). “It is a great place. The team is very, very caring,” Ed commented. “He's gained a lot of muscle back,” Alice said. “I can't put my fingers around his arm anymore. He can ‘beat us up,’ and he takes great joy in that.” Lately, Alice has been challenging Zach to give better hugs, and he squeezes her hard, “laughing his head off.” “That’s not good, Zach,” she responds. “That is not loving your mother,” she jokes and then Zach responds with a laugh. Although he remains non-verbal, Zach is now using a tablet to communicate with his caregivers. “The best time of each day is 4:30-5:00, giving him supper, until we leave between 8:30 or 9:00,” explained Ed. “It is almost as if the family memories are all back. You can say certain sayings we used to say at home and he starts to laugh. So he is in a good mood, with lots of laughs.” They always read a devotional together and pray before leaving for the night. “He is dialed in when you’re reading. I try to keep my finger on the words.” He is also able to make it to church some Sundays. “He is listening,” Alice explained. She gave an example of the pastor sharing a one-liner joke and “Zach was even laughing without prompt, where it’s like he sort of gets it.” Blessed is he who considers the poor Having a good laugh with his pappy. Ed and Alice testified that their loving Father has been caring for them every step of the way. “God gives you strength for every day. Not for the next year, not for the next…. No, he gives it for today. It is a real thing,” emphasized Alice. Both Ed and Alice see God’s hand particularly in how He prepared Ed for this new role with his recent career. A lot of Ed’s work was related to protection for the vulnerable. The transition was from advocating for this protection, to actually providing it themselves. But the work experience had deeper application. It didn’t take long and Ed was convicted, particularly through a family member, to advocate for other caregivers through setting up a platform called “Running for Zach”. “We aren’t the only ones doing this. There is a brain injury every three minutes in Canada and it is the leading cause of disability and death in adults under the age of 35. There is a real, real need.” Ed pointed particularly to Psalm 41:1: “Blessed is he who considers the poor.” He explained that the word “poor” means much more than those without financial means. It is the vulnerable, the weak, those who can’t help themselves. “To consider the poor means to pay close attention to them and then to spend significant time and energy changing their lives.” Always one for a quip, Ed proceeded to connect this Psalm to a quote from Dr. Seuss: “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not!” This goes beyond the Zachs of the world. “We are all vulnerable in one way, shape, or form. We’re all weak. The church should be a haven of caregivers and a haven for caregivers. It should be caregiving central.” I asked Ed and Alice how we, as a church community, can better care for caregivers. Ed said the first step is to overcome the fear of approaching and speaking with the caregivers. “It’s fear. Fear that you are going to say something stupid, fear that you are going to cry. If you are exiting church, don’t try to find a different route to bypass the caregiver.” “Quit stewing too much over ‘I’m not sure what to say’ or ‘I’m not sure what to do.’ Doing something or saying something is better than nothing.” He added that “if you can go to the fellowship hall and talk to somebody about your fishing trip the previous week, surely you can go to a caregiver and find out what’s going on in their lives.” Ed and Alice are grateful to be part of a church community where the leadership led by example in this regard, with an elder or deacon coming to visit them every week. Ironically, it has often been the elder or deacon who leaves feeling lifted up. Kion Foundation First trip back to the mountains since the injury. Ed is now working on building a charitable organization called “The Kion Foundation.” Kion means pillar, and the foundation hopes to be a pillar of hope for families navigating acquired brain injuries. Beyond awareness, the goal is to help fill the care gap between a hospital discharge and home, providing things like centralized therapy and support spaces for caregivers to go to and receive help. Ed shared that it would take 2.8 million full-time equivalent workers to replace the 5.7 billion unpaid hours that family caregivers provide each year in Canada. That is a lot of people, including Christians, who are humbly serving outside the medical system. They need support. The Kion Foundation’s board includes Ed’s brother-in-law, Ed Tams, an entrepreneur, as well as Dr. Stephen Neal; Alisa Lieuwen, whose brother was diagnosed with a rare neurological condition that resulted in him becoming quadriplegic and non-verbal; and Wanda Knol, a business owner and volunteer serving the vulnerable. Designed to be a burden Although we can look forward to a world without the effects of sin, we can trust that God has a good purpose for where we find ourselves today. That includes the burdens He gives us. Ed quoted pastor and theologian John Stott: “We all are designed to be a burden to others. You are designed to be a burden to me, and I am designed to be a burden to you.” Instead of doing everything possible to run from these burdens, we can take to heart our LORD’s calling to “carry each other’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal. 6:2). Zach isn’t running like he used to. But he is running the race marked out for him. Running alongside him, we can look forward to crossing the finish line, where we will not just run, but soar like eagles. “Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.” (Heb. 12:1-2) “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Is. 40:30-31)...

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How to catch Ice Age Man using digital reindeer

What would happen if we assumed ancient man was intelligent? One man did just that, and I haven’t been able to stop talking about it since. Which, incidentally, is a substantial reason to have 10 children, all of whom you homeschool. Captive audience. Professor John O’Shea is an archaeologist with the University of Michigan who likes to read. (It’s a good habit. Highly recommend.) One day, he was reading a book about subarctic reindeer* hunters and the stone structures they use to direct the animals. He was also studying a topographical map of the bottom of Lake Huron. The map included a feature known as Six Fathom Shoal, a continuous underwater ridge connecting southern Ontario to northeast Michigan. During the last days of the Ice Age, that ridge would have been above water, separating Lake Huron into two lakes. As John studied the map and read about the hunters, he realized that the ridge would have been a great place to hunt reindeer thousands of years ago. So he took a team and scanned the lake bottom. It wasn’t easy. The underwater ridge encompasses hundreds of square miles of lakebed, and just reaching the site required a 60-mile trip over unpredictable water. Expectations were low. Often the weather was too dangerous to even think about sailing, but on the rare occasions when they could get out of their port in Alpena, they used side scanning sonar to create a map of the lake bottom. One day, by “dumb luck” they stumbled upon something that maybe only John would have expected or recognized; a line of rocks. Stick with me here. On the leftside, of course You see, reindeer are essentially British. They like queues. Lines. Geometry, one might say, is their love language. To direct reindeer, a hunter can create a line on the ground, usually with stones – sometimes it amounts to a low fence This is called a “drive line.” When the reindeer encounter the line, even though they could easily jump over it, they will often walk alongside it wherever it leads. Not unlike Harold and the Purple Crayon. The line of rocks John O’Shea found on the bottom of the lake looked a lot like a drive lane. Further investigation by a tethered, unmanned underwater robot, and later, divers, revealed it was indeed a man-made drive lane, pointing towards a corral and a blind where the hunters could wait to kill the animals. An incredible, career-changing, history-making discovery. But it gets better. Next, John teamed up with Bob Reynolds from Wayne State University, and together they created a digital topographical map of Six Fathom Shoal during the Ice Age. They simulated rain, and the map filled with rivers, lakes, waterfalls, marshes and creeks. They enlisted botanists to look at the landscape and predict where different plants would have grown. And once the computer world was complete, they did the next sensible thing. They turned an entire herd of AI reindeer loose on the landscape. Initially, the AI reindeer had an annoying habit of walking off cliffs, gliding on stiff, pixelated legs to a swift digital death. The programming took a while to tweak, but as the weeks went on, the AI reindeer took on an increasingly lifelike set of behaviors. The herd was sent from one side of Six Fathom Shoal to the other, and patterns emerged as they learned which routes were best. Then John’ team asked modern reindeer hunters from Alaska and Canada to walk through the virtual landscape on computers, pointing out the best locations for blinds, campsites, and caches. They took intelligent human beings and asked them where they would hunt and then assumed that ancient man would hunt in the same places. Shocking. With this information in hand, they returned to inspect the sea floor. And that’s how they discovered a hunting structure they called “drop site 45.” Right in the location pinpointed as a choke site for the AI reindeer. This hunting site is the most sophisticated of its kind discovered to date. It includes a drive line, blinds, fire pits, and stone rings that indicate places where the hunters may have camped. They also found stone structures identical to those used by modern subarctic hunters to store caches of meat during the freezing winter months. Further investigation revealed stone tools, including one made with obsidian from Oregon. Yep. Oregon. Wagontire, Oregon, to be exact, over 2,000 miles away from the underwater ridge where it was found. Not bad for Ice Age hunters. “None of this matches the models we had about peoples in this region… you have to go back and be like, ‘All right, now we have this new data, what does that mean for what we thought about peoples that were living in the Great Lakes?’ You have to rewrite the story.” – Ashley Lemke, Professor at the University of Wisconsin Milwaukee Breaking down or evolving up? She’s right, of course. The models she’s talking about are based on the assumption that humans evolved from ape-like creatures, stumbling out of the dull fog of an animal existence to come to a shocking realization: “Fire… hot?” Of course we had never looked for evidence of Ice Age structures at Six Mile Shoal before, because the odds of such a creature building anything were slim. But what could we accomplish if we started with the assumption that man was created intelligent and capable, as the Bible teaches? Adam and Eve, coming straight from the hand of the Creator, had perfect genes. Those genes have only deteriorated a little more with each generation that passes. So those Ice Age hunters could well have been more intelligent than you or I. Computer models and sonar can recreate the Ice Age shorelines along the entire globe. What would happen if we looked at those maps and asked where we would build our cities, ports or villages? In some places, accumulated sediment has probably buried any Ice Age structures, but some remain. At the moment, our preferred method of finding these sites is dumb luck. That’s how we discovered a similar hunting drive line under the Baltic sea. The entire underwater world of Doggerland was also discovered by a series of accidents. What if we trusted the Biblical account enough to use less accidents and more “AI reindeer”? Shannon Skaer is an ancient history aficionado, homeschool mom, science nerd, and beekeeper. She lives in a small logging town in Oregon with her very own hero and their ten children. Her life could best be described as a love affair with beauty – which explains the number of babies – and her greatest joy is to know God, from whom all beauty comes. Find out more about her at www.shannonskaer.com. ***** *Reindeer is the fun name for Caribou. For this article, I refer to them as “reindeer” because I’m not a party pooper, and neither are you....

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The definition of patience

Patience. It’s a word we would never bother looking up in the dictionary because we already understand its meaning. But sometimes a well-known word can leap to life with new meaning and application when we read its formal definition. So consider what Dictionary.com has to say about patience. Patience: putting up with annoyance, misfortune, delay, or hardship, with fortitude and calm and without complaint, loss of temper, irritation or the like. It is an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay. Wow. Simply put, patience means not showing annoyance or anger with people or things that aren’t acting as we desire! From this definition we can deduce that we are very often…. not patient! This definition leads me to believe that the practice of “patience” or “impatience” relies almost completely on the words that come out of our mouths and the body language that we exhibit (heavy sighs, eye-rolling, stomping, slamming doors) when we do not like what is being said or done. Is patience an attitude then, or an action? Love is patient It definitely starts with an attitude – we have to decide how we are going to react, and we do that by recognizing what is right and wrong and then making our choice. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul tells us that, “Love is patient.” That means that love puts up with "annoyance, misfortune, delay, and hardship with fortitude and calm and without complaint, loss of temper, or irritation." It means love is the "ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance." In Romans 12:9-21 Paul tells us how to behave like Christians. Part of that includes verse 12, which states, “rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulations, be steadfast in prayer.” That means that when we have tribulation (which means trials, troubles, problems, aggravations) we are supposed to put up with them with fortitude and calm and without complaint, loss of temper, or irritation; we are to suppress restlessness and annoyance. Excusing ourselves But patience is not easy, and it has become difficult to recognize right from wrong because our culture not only excuses impatience, it exalts it as a right and a virtue. It is “only understandable” to be impatient in traffic or standing in line, when confronted with confused or ignorant people, or in obtaining whatever it is that we need or want. Television commercials suggest that we grab each other’s breakfast food, race to beat our spouse to the better car, and complain loudly whenever things displease us. Life is all about indulgence and not letting anyone or anything get in our way. It is also very easy to excuse our behavior by blaming our impatience on our workload, our temperament, our upbringing, our heritage, our gender, or our age (whether young or old!). Recognizing the sin of impatience So let’s get the definition of patience correct first – let’s know right from wrong, because God tells us in several places that we are to be patient, including with family and church members. How do we talk to and about our church family? 1 Thessalonians 5:14 tells us that as we “warn the unruly, comfort the faint-hearted, and uphold the weak,” we are to “be patient with all” of them. This is different than “tsk-tsking” as we look down our noses. Paul tells us to express all the fruit of the Spirit spoken of in Galatians 5:22-23: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self-control. This involves not demanding our own perceived “rights” or our own way. It involves loving others more than ourselves for “love overlooks a multitude of sins” as well as mistakes and small differences (1 Peter 4:8). And it involves trusting God to take care of the details when there are delays and difficulties. We must drop the hurry and the worry about what others might think of us. Either we are acting patiently, or we are not. God’s written and preached Word can give us strength that helps us choose patient behavior. We exhibit this fruit of the Holy Spirit best when we are walking closest to Him. The Apostle Paul said in Romans: “So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me” (7:21). So true. But having a better definition of this sin will at least help us to identify our inclination towards it, and make it less excusable. God tells us to be patient: to put up with daily trials without complaint or irritation. The best news is that He promises strength through the Holy Spirit, and forgives our confessed sins daily as well. “Faithful is He who calls us, who also will do it” (1 Thess. 5:24). This article was first published in January 2017....

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In Christ

The antidote to works righteousness and the anxiety, exhaustion, and resentment that comes with it. ***** I used to enjoy rock climbing. At least, I thought I did. If you’ve tried it, you know what it feels like to be 50 feet up a cliff, clutching any hold thicker than the edge of a loonie. I would normally “top-rope,” which involved my brother belaying from the bottom and the rope running through a carabiner at the top and back down to my harness. If I fell, my brother ensured that I wouldn’t fall far. But there were occasions when we couldn’t get a rope to the top and would have to “lead climb.” The climber would take the rope up as he climbed, and, using carabiners and a sling, secure it to bolts that were drilled into the cliff, usually about every 10 feet. So, if you climbed 10 feet past a bolt and were almost at the next one, you knew that a fall at that point would send you, not just to the next bolt, but 10 feet beyond it. Even if the belayer was holding the rope firmly, he couldn’t stop you from falling 20 feet! You were on your own. Even if my mind was willing, it was when I needed the most stability and strength that my body would sometimes rebel and stiffen or shake uncontrollably. It wasn’t enough to be determined. My body didn’t cooperate with my mind. And then my mind would soon lose faith. As much as I wanted it, there was no way I could simply will myself into being able to do this – there was going to be no summit. And if I insisted on trying, there may have even been a painful fall. Lead-climbing life In many ways, the same has been true of my effort to live as a Christian. Perhaps you can identify. From our youth we are urged to “become like Christ.” WWJD or “What would Jesus do?” is ringing in many ears. Perhaps it is a Bible passage like “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me” (Phil. 3:14) or maybe a doctrine we were instructed in, such as our calling to be a prophet, priest, and king (Lord’s Day 12, Heidelberg Catechism). The underlying message we hear from many pulpits, classrooms, and dinner tables is “you confess to being a Christian, now act like it!” Throughout my life, I have been trying to make progress towards the LORD. One foot hold at a time, I have been striving to overcome fear and failure and make it to the summit. But like my twitching body on the cliff, I have been humbled time and again. As much as I willed to make progress, my body was weak. “Step it up, Mark!” I told myself time and again. As I shared in a previous article on anxiety, eventually I burnt out. I got to the point where I felt like I could barely move, let alone summit anything. It is a horrible feeling to be a father, husband, and leader, and yet incapable of basic functioning. That was about 8 years ago. My journey with understanding anxiety and stress has been ongoing, and I have been blessed with many helpful resources. But beneath it all I have discovered a spiritual root – I was trying to earn God’s favor, to measure up, to prove my status as His child. Yes, I understand what grace means, and I’m convinced that I can be justified only by faith alone, in Christ alone. I’ve clipped my rope into these spiritual truths again and again, and then tried to keep climbing up, towards the summit. But it doesn’t take long before I’m weary, restless, or anxious again. Then I’m left shaking on the side of the cliff. It has taken me too long to realize the answer has been close at hand all my life. It is captured in many places in Scripture, including: “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Rom. 8:1) “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.” (Gal. 2:20) “...to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.” (Eph. 4:22-24) “For in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith. For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ.” (Gal. 3:26-27) The theme of being “in Christ” is immersed throughout the New Testament. When Paul refers to himself, he doesn’t call himself a Christian. Rather, he calls himself a “man in Christ” (2 Cor. 12:2). Christ himself draws this out in John 15 when He describes how He is the true vine and we are branches. “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me” (John 15:4). The branch doesn’t grow itself and then find a vine or branch to attach itself to and form a partnership with. We find our life wholly in Christ. He initiates the growth, He sustains with His life-giving water, and He carries us through the winds and storms of life. “Jesus does not call us to mimic him but to manifest Him,” explains Steve Cuss, in his book Managing Leadership Anxiety. In my leadership and writing, as well as my parenting, I have constantly gotten this wrong. And the challenges I see in the Christian community suggest that I’m the norm, not the exception. “Becoming like Christ is what God does in us, not what we do. God is the active agent; we are the recipients,” explains Cuss (emphasis added). But isn’t there something we need to do? Cuss points to Scripture and explains that our first task is something we aren’t usually that keen to do: to die to our old self (Rom. 6:6, Eph. 4:22-24, Col. 3:5-10). That includes the age-old propensity to purse these false needs: Control Perfection Always having the answer Being there for everyone in need Approval The truth is that these are attributes of God, not us. He is in control. He is perfect. He knows everything. He is there for everyone. And He give us our approval. As Steve Cuss explains, “anytime a human being tries to take on a God-sized job, we get reactive.” Feeling stressed lately? Perhaps, like me, you are trying to become like God rather than living in Christ. Like many other Christians, I have spent much of my life trying to be faithful, while not experiencing the peace that Christ promises us when we abide in Him. Reformed Perspective’s core purpose Every healthy organization should have a clearly-articulated reason for being. At our December board meeting, the board of Reformed Perspective settled on this core purpose: Helping you think, speak, and act in Christ. This flows from our mission statement of “equipping and encouraging Christians to think, speak, and act in a manner consistent with their confession.” But hopefully you can also distinguish the nuance of the last two words. Instead of encouraging Christians to “step it up” by living in line with what we confess, the new focus is on thinking, speaking, and acting in Christ. We think, speak, and act not to become like Christ. Rather, like a branch that produces fruit, our good works happen because we are connected to the Vine. We already are in Christ. We already are accepted. We already are loved. I don’t have to climb toward God’s favor. I don’t have to fear my next slip and fall. Christ has already summitted for me and is holding me firmly while I complete my journey. We humbly invite you, our readers and listeners, to hold us accountable to our stated purpose, as we seek to assist you in thinking, speaking, and acting in Christ....

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Navigating failure

Fear of failure can paralyze you. There’s a lot to be said about how, in order to succeed, you need to be comfortable with failure – but that doesn’t erase the fact that failing feels painful and shameful. Who wants that? Better to avoid it. Suddenly success becomes less important than “not failing.” And the only sure way to avoid all the feelings that come with not being able to do something is to not try it at all. Not trying assures you of not failing. But in trying to avoid failure, you can hold yourself back from doing things in your path that God has given you to do. So what’s a good way to navigate failure? There are two different approaches I've taken at different times of my life to deal with this fear of failure. They both begin with a question. What would you do – or attempt – or explore... 1) …if you knew you couldn’t fail – that it was impossible? 2) … if you were free to fail?” 1. What if you could not fail? “What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” I first came across this question in a book called Launching a Leadership Revolution, but asking this kind of question is a pretty common approach to working with a fear of failure. Why? Because this question can be clarifying: stop thinking about what’s holding you back and start thinking about what you’d really want to do if you could. Once you know what you really want, then you can think about how to navigate the obstacles that might come up. If you never stop to think about what you really desire to accomplish, you could spend your whole life doing things that feel safe just because they feel safe, and miss what you might be uniquely suited to do. But this question can also be disheartening, and it certainly was for me back when I first read it. Because the answer was – a lot more than what I was doing at that moment. I can’t count how many times the fear of terrible things happening to me stopped me, all because I couldn’t count on these terrible things not happening. And I’m not alone in dreaming of a world of failure-free achievement, judging by the number of self-help books that use this quote. It is true that many successful people plowed on despite failure and in the face of more failure, but I couldn’t shake the nagging awareness of people who did plow on after failing and just kept on failing. I know failure isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But it can feel terrible. And there’s no guarantee that “keep trying” will lead to success. So I found it difficult to ignore the thought of failure, as this quote seemed to advise me to do. Or even to accept failure as part of the process. The quote did, however, inspire me to dream about what I’d like to achieve with my life. It helps cut to the chase of what you really want to do, even if you feel at the moment that it’s unachievable. Which brings me to the second approach. 2. What if you were free to fail? “When you’ve been found, you’re free to fail.” – James K.A. Smith, On the Road with St. Augustine When you’re young, life is more about trying to make choices about what you want to do, and that must’ve drawn me to the first question years ago. Maybe I’m drawn to this second quote more now as I’m older and navigating the result of my own and other people’s failures. Here’s the full quote in context: “Resting in the love of God doesn’t squelch ambition; it fuels it with a different fire. I don’t have to strive to get God to love me; rather, because God loves me unconditionally, I’m free to take risks and launch out into the deep. I’m released to aspire to use my gifts in gratitude, caught up in God’s mission for the sake of the world. When you’ve been found, you’re free to fail.” Rest, rather than striving. Release rather than control. And the peace of God’s love, rather than approval conditional on success. Humans judge on achievements. We compare each other, and we compare ourselves to each other, and in the age of social media it doesn’t take long to see how much we lack in comparison to everyone else. But if life is about what we produce, what we show, and whether we’ve made good on the promise or potential we showed at one point, how can we ever find peace? Good questions both I still like both questions though. What would you do if you knew you could not fail is for young people deciding what to do with their lives. They’re making decisions about paths to take. They’re trying to diagnose their passions. What if you’re free to fail is for when you get a little older. It’s for those days when you’re dealing with the knowledge you have failed at various things. You DID fail. What does that mean? How do you handle it? Failure hits us because we take it as a reflection of who we are and what we’re worth. But we’re urged to start from a place of acceptance – God’s acceptance. Sometimes failure weighs on us because we know our sin is involved. Our feelings of guilt add to the pain of failure. But the beauty of this quote is that it prevents us from relying on “fixing” ourselves – God makes us acceptable. God loved us even when we were dead in our sins, and He promises us no sin can come between us if we turn to Him. God doesn’t ask us to overcome our failures before He loves us. He makes us new, and we can rely on that. So this is not only about the type of failure you can learn from. It’s not just the kind of “failing so you know what to do better next time.” Not the kind of failing that life coaches advise you is good for you (“fail fast and fail hard!”). No, this applies to the kind of failing that seems completely futile, that seems to have no meaning and no lesson to learn. The kind of failure that can crush you and make you too paralyzed to do anything more. You need the promise you’re accepted no matter what. What we really need Because here’s the thing about failure: you won’t avoid it. In a broken world, you will crash and burn at some point. But maybe we face failure for a reason – to be reminded that we cannot go through life on our own. Failure forces us to face the reality we’re dependent on God. He has to take us through the next steps. Both of the above approaches to failure are quotes from human authors. But the Bible reminds us that God promises to be there in all our shortcomings. In 2 Cor. 12:9 we read how God reminded Paul that, “My power is made perfect in weakness,” and in Phil 1:6 Paul reminds us that God “who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” What God started, He will finish, and we can rest in that assurance. In the end, none of us will be failures. What we really need is not to reach certain milestones, to earn anything, or to look successful in the eyes of the world, but rather to learn that utter dependence on God. If you can let go and let God work out His plan for the world, you can trust He will bring everything to good. You can trust He knows the way even when you don’t....

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Taming busyness: practical tips

“If I’m caught up on my laundry, does that mean I’m not doing enough for the church?” “Am I allowed to fit in time for exercise, or only if it’s between 6 and 7 AM?” “Can I say ‘no’ to the women’s Bible study if it’s the only night this week that my husband and I are both home?” Even when our hearts and minds are in the right place, there are still to-do’s and deadlines, crises in our life, and decisions to be made (and, occasionally, goofy questions that cross our mind). Here are some of the tips women shared with me (quoted and paraphrased) to help tame the inevitable busyness of life. Be deliberate about the complications you add Be deliberate about the complications you add to your life… Our gadgets, our wardrobe, our extracurriculars, how we celebrate holidays – can we simplify? How busy are we with details that don’t really matter, or that add more stress than joy? Every commitment or complication you add to your life (joining a sports team, getting a pet, opening an Etsy shop, growing a garden) adds busyness – often more than we anticipate. Embrace these kinds of good opportunities, by all means, but choose the ones that will truly enrich your life and that fit in with your other priorities. Know your limits Don’t cheat your body – it really does need sleep, healthy food, and exercise (and maybe not quite that much caffeine). Recognize not just your limits of physical busyness, but also of being mentally/emotionally “used up.” “I used to ‘push through,’ but there’s always a payback time eventually.” “Develop healthy habits and trust God to care for you.” “When I cross the line to too busy, I start to take myself too seriously, I lose joy in my task, and the people that I presumably love the most in the world become burdensome to me. That is always my sign that I have to slow down.” “If I can’t help with something I can always pray for that person, activity, situation. I’m saying no but I trust that God is already there providing.” Know what’s important You will miss out on some good and worthwhile things – and so will your kids. If you know you’re saying “no” to something because you’re committed to what you’re saying “yes” to, it’s easier to let opportunities pass you by. “I decided that, at this stage of life, healthy meals are more important than a perfectly clean house. Maybe one day I’ll have time for both... or, maybe not.” “Sometimes ‘done’ is better than ‘perfect.’” “Accept a bit more chaos.” “There are times when I suddenly realize that all the kids are overdue for haircuts again, and the boys’ pants are showing a bit too much sock. But they’re all loved and fed so I try not to stress too much.” Know what “fills you up” Some things deplete us (and we can’t entirely avoid these things), while other things recharge us. Recognize the things that energize you, and find opportunities to do them: coaching a school team, baking cinnamon buns for a stressed-out friend, bringing flowers to shut-ins, writing an article? Start your day right What do you reach for first in the morning: your phone or your Bible? Treasure Sundays and breaks that refresh Sunday can bring its own busyness. If you’re not refreshed and refocused by your Sunday habits, does something need to change? Breaks are good, but sometimes they’re not truly rejuvenating. The last time you let yourself mindlessly scroll on your phone for a mental break, how did you actually feel afterwards? What if you took a short walk or picked up your devotional instead? Identify your biggest time-waster(s) Where or how do you get most distracted and waste the most time, without any significant benefit to yourself or others? Reclaim some of this “lost time”: set time limits for yourself, ask for accountability from a loved one, or remove the source of a temptation. Do the small thing when you can’t do the big one No time for that visit? You can send an encouraging note. Never seem to make it to the gym? Find a ten-minute online workout. Something is (almost) always better than nothing. “Do a little and trust that God will use it.” Spread the load If you’re a mom – kids and chores: how well acquainted are yours? Your investment of time in teaching your kids helpful skills will pay off for everyone, not least for your kids themselves. Do you have a friend or sibling with different strengths than you? Could you swap some tasks in a way that benefits you both? Get extra mileage out of your time “I listen to the Bible on audio while driving, or cooking.” “We use our dinner times to intentionally check in with our kids, try to have meaningful conversations and stay connected.” “Turn all those driving time (sports, appointments, etc.) into one-on-one ‘dates’ with your kids. Often great conversations happen when it’s just the two of you in the car.” “If you’re running an errand, always take one child along.” Kids and chores: are yours acquainted? Recognize there are different seasons in life Although balance is a good overall goal, there are seasons that will feel out of balance. There are also times when certain things we’d love to do just aren’t possible because of the pressing needs of the moment. One mom shared with me that she used to get frustrated because it was hard to find quiet time for devotions with her young kids around. So she started doing devotions with them instead – reading and praying out loud, and letting her kids “take notes” in their own little notebooks while she journaled. It’s been a good solution for this stage of her life. “Looking back, the time when my kids were small and were all at home was so short. Why was I so impatient to try to fit in all kinds of other things?” Count your blessings “Sometimes when I feel complain-y about all the things I have to do, I think about my immigrant grandmothers. I have choices and conveniences they never would’ve dreamed of. It’s a good reality check.” ...

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The evil of simplicity

If ever there was an idol thoroughly ripe and ready for a great heaving into eternal hell fire, it has to be the idol of simplicity. This leapt to my attention, not for the first time, this morning when I made the grave mistake of wandering from the “Holds” section of our depraved local library and into the cookbook aisle. My sight was immediately accosted with drivel — 5 Easy Ways to Feed People So That They Will Never Ask You to Do It Again, Eating with No Grain and Only a Fraction of a Grimace, and Whole 30 to Become Half a Human. I might be paraphrasing. A little. We are people captivated by convenience and ease, by a false simplicity. The only simplicity worth having is that simplicity we don’t want: simplicity of heart, childlike faith, accepting what our Father gives us without throwing a fit about it, because He is our dad and if He says we need it, then we do. Everything spelled out? No, we have no use for true simplicity. We want systems. We want all the ways to save time, money and calories. There is a paradox here – true simplicity gives rise to perfect complexity, the sort that can be in awe of fungus that is good to eat, and in awe of the mystery of breastfeeding, the sort that can know it is worthwhile to make a thing with your own hands, and that saving time can be the most deadly waste of all. But when simplicity is the goal in and of itself, all such glorious complexity is once and for all abandoned for the sake of efficiency, of economy, of a time-saving system or technique. Ironically, our quest for simplicity often goes hand in hand with a devotion to busyness, and thus the vicious cycle is born. You worry that if the only socialization your kids receive is at home (gah, what if they start talking like me??) and at church, such that they will grow up to be like that oddball who sings with a sign on the corners of intersections trying to get you to buy mattresses. So you sign them up for activities and sports and lessons (I wonder how many of the decisions we make as parents have their beginnings in fear...). This busyness drives you to seek out ways to “maximize your time.” You meal prep – perhaps you cook one day a month and freeze it, if you are an ambitious homemaker at heart, or maybe you just buy pre-packaged meals and snacks, things that can be heated up quickly or eaten on the run. You make a detailed plan for getting all the laundry done as you seek the simple life... but true simplicity just does the wash, and thanks God for having people to dirty the clothes He gave you. The quest for simplicity blinds us to the stunning complexity that is living. Simple shouldn’t drive Don’t get me wrong – the frozen pizza is not the problem. I love frozen pizza and canned food is a gift. It is always about the heart. Simplicity is a bad master. So is complexity, for that matter. Pride creeps in on both fields and makes a mess of our enjoyments and our work. All well and good, you might be saying, but the laundry actually does need doing and I think better with a system! Without a plan, my whole house reeks of stinky socks! Take a breath (well, unless you haven’t been doing your laundry). This is not an indictment of planning or of systems. It is not even necessarily a criticism of trying to find the easiest, fastest, cheapest way to do things. There are good reasons for pursuing all of these goals. The evil I find is when the means becomes the end. We are a forgetful people; we build idols out of anything and everything. So much to appreciate Let’s contemplate an example of what I am talking about, shall we? It is August as I write this and all the vegetables on the farm are ripe for the taking. There is tremendous abundance. I am delighted by everything about summer squash: the color of sunshine, the smooth, thin exterior, the butter-colored flesh, and a flavor mild enough to serve with anything. Our visit to the library was cut blissfully and providentially short by the knowledge that we needed to get back home in time to bake a Yukon gold potato and summer squash torte that I had prepared for lunch. This delicious dish was new to me and I think it demonstrates the principle I am fumbling around to express. There is nothing inherently difficult or fussy about this torte. It is thinly sliced potato and squash, layered with drizzles of olive oil and a cheese and salt and pepper mixture, with green onions sprinkled throughout, baked to a golden, crispy-edged perfection. Yet it was captivating – appreciation led me to take the time to slice, to stir, to grind, to arrange, to bake. It took time and attention to use the gifts of the ultimate Husbandman well, and the result was lovely, a feast for the senses. It was not the easiest way to use the vegetables, it was not the least expensive lunch, it was in no way time saving. But there is glory in gratitude. One of the interesting side effects of offering up your time and money and effort during the preparation of a thing is that it tends to encourage a similar offering up in the receiving of the thing. A torte that took two hours to prepare (not even considering the time and effort spent in the growing of the vegetables) could certainly be scarfed down in mere moments... but it felt so natural to eat it slowly, to lift layers and perceive what the heat of the oven had accomplished in the time it was given. Simple, right? His world is far from simple You are up to your eyeballs in the generous, way over-the-top gifts of God. And the only simple part of this gift-giving is meant to be the receiving – wide-eyed, hands clapping, laughter bubbling out of you because He did it again! He made wild things grow in the wood, He caused the carpet fibers to hold their form and be soft under your feet, He spoke flowers and hummingbirds and green lacewings into existence and taught them to dance. So sing while you work, drink your water from a pretty glass, be in awe that hair can be combed, live amazed. He has not given you the future; today’s gifts are more than enough to keep you occupied, to fill your arms and your thoughts and your affections. This story is way too big to waste on simplicity....

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C.S. Lewis on real happiness and real Christianity

So who does not want to be happy? We all do, but wanting something is not the same as finding it. We all strive after happiness, but how many people actually find true, lasting happiness? Of course for the Christian, we know this is a foolish quest. Search for joy and it will elude you. Search for God wholeheartedly and you will be found by Him and happiness will be thrown in as a by-product. This is basic Christian teaching, yet sadly even most Christians today seem to get this wrong big time. So many sermons we hear today are all about your own happiness and peace and satisfaction and having all your desires met. How can I be successful and happy and satisfied and prosperous? That is what we hear so often: it is all about self, self-satisfaction, self-fulfillment and personal happiness. Instead of the biblical emphasis on the denial of self, we get plenty of self-centered foolishness by church leaders who should know better. We expect the world to get it wrong here, but Christian pastors? Consider folks like Joel Osteen, the guy with the biggest church in America. This is what he said: “To find happiness, quit focusing on what’s wrong with you and start focusing on what’s right with you.” Um no, Joel, that is not the way it works at all. That is not even remotely biblical. We are to focus on God and God alone, and seek after holiness (without which no one will see God – Hebrews 12:14) and as a by-product, peace and happiness may well follow. But we are never told to seek after it, put it first, or to believe that we can somehow find it by focusing on our self. The real nature of happiness, and why it should not be our central concern, is something C.S. Lewis spoke often about. He wrote much about happiness, or joy. Indeed, he called his autobiography Surprised By Joy. In his many well-known works he speaks much to this. Here I want to look at some of his lesser-known writings as I discuss this issue. He wrote about these themes throughout his life, and even in his very last writing before his death in November 1963, he was discussing this. His essay “We Have No ‘Right To Happiness'” (later published in God in the Dock) speaks directly to this. A superficial happiness So what did he say in his last known writing? He mentions a woman who claimed a “right to happiness,” and says: “At first this sounds to me as odd as a right to good luck. For I believe – whatever one school of moralists may say – that we depend for a very great deal of our happiness or misery on circumstances outside of human control. A right to happiness doesn’t, for me, make much more sense than a right to be six feet tall, or to have a millionaire for your father, or to get good weather whenever you want to have a picnic.” He goes on to say that this woman meant primarily “sexual happiness.” He concludes his piece with these words: “Though the ‘right to happiness’ is chiefly claimed for the sexual impulse, it seems to me impossible that the matter should stay there. The fatal principle, once allowed in that department, must sooner or later seep through our whole lives. We thus advance toward a state of society in which not only each man but every impulse in each man claims carte blanche . And then, though our technological skill may help us survive a little longer, our civilization will have died at heart, and will – one dare not even add ‘unfortunately’ – be swept away.” Another essay, also found in God in the Dock, is entitled “Answers to Questions on Christianity”. Question 11 asks this: “Which of the religions of the world gives to its followers the greatest happiness?” To this he gave this now famous reply: “While it lasts, the religion of worshipping oneself is the best. I have an elderly acquaintance of about eighty, who has lived a life of unbroken selfishness and self-admiration from the earliest years, and is, more or less, I regret to say, one of the happiest men I know. From the moral point of view it is very difficult! I am not approaching the question from that angle. As you perhaps know, I haven’t always been a Christian. I didn’t go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity. I am certain there must be a patent American article on the market which will suit you far better, but I can’t give any advice on it.” No abiding happiness apart from God But perhaps some of his most-well known comments about happiness come from his classic Mere Christianity. As he says there: “The moment you have a self at all, there is a possibility of putting yourself first – wanting to be the centre – wanting to be God, in fact. That was the sin of Satan: and that was the sin he taught the human race. Some people think the fall of man had something to do with sex, but that is a mistake. (The story in the Book of Genesis rather suggests that some corruption in our sexual nature followed the fall and was its result, not its cause.) “What Satan put into the heads of our remote ancestors was the idea that they could ‘be like gods’ – could set up on their own as if they had created themselves – be their own masters – invent some sort of happiness for themselves outside God, apart from God. And out of that hopeless attempt has come nearly all that we call human history – money, poverty, ambition, war, prostitution, classes, empires, slavery – the long terrible story of man trying to find something other than God which will make him happy. “The reason why it can never succeed is this. God made us: invented us as a man invents an engine. A car is made to run on petrol, and it would not run properly on anything else. Now God designed the human machine to run on Himself. He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other. That is why it is just no good asking God to make us happy in our own way without bothering about religion. God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.” And the very last paragraph of his book says this: “Give up yourself and you will find your real self. Lose your life and you will save it. Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favourite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end submit with every fibre of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.” Conclusion Exactly right. This is indeed the basic Christian understanding, yet we have an entire generation of Christian teachers and preachers who have totally lost this, and are preaching a me-centered gospel which must disappoint. A focus on self, our wants, our desires, and our lusts is exactly what Satan wants us to do – but not God. Jesus made the secret to happiness absolutely plain in the Beatitudes (Matthew 5:1-12). Blessedness or happiness consists of being poor, being meek, mourning, being persecuted, and the like. That is the path to happiness. It is about denial of self, as Jesus spoke about so often. It certainly is not about being fixated on self, seeking your best life now, or aiming for material wealth and possessions. What Lewis said about happiness is just the simple Christian gospel. How can so many believers and preachers today miss this so thoroughly? Bill Muehlenberg blogs on culture daily at BillMuehlenberg.com where this first appeared. It is reprinted here with permission, and was first posted to our website in September of 2018....

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Veya’s story

The fight for her life in a broken and biased healthcare system – one that sees doctors perpetrating euthanasia and abortion and calling them both medical care. ***** “Our sweet Veya Hope ran into the arms of Jesus yesterday.” So shared Veya’s mother, Krystal Vanderbrugghen, on her Instagram page on August 2, 2025. Krystal continued: “Her name was her calling – Hope. She carried it with her every single day she spent inside those hospital rooms and gave it to all who knew her.” Veya was first introduced to the waiting world, and to the arms of her parents Krystal and Jeremy, just a year and a half earlier, on December 4, 2023. Although the LORD didn’t have many days allotted for Veya here on Earth, her life touched tens of thousands of hearts. And her experiences here also exposed just how difficult it can be to fight for care in a broken world and medical system. “We pray that Veya’s story continues to encourage other families who are given this same precious gift – the gift of loving and raising a child with Down Syndrome,” Krystal explained. Hope born Jeremy and Krystal, along with their other children Ivylee, Irelyn, and Lincoln, live in Caledonia, Ontario. In the fall of 2023, as they were eagerly awaiting the birth of another child, they learned that their baby had a congenital heart defect which would require surgery at some point after birth. “While this is a lot to process, we know without a doubt God truly has a perfect plan for this baby even though the road ahead is filled with uncertainties.” That’s what Krystal shared at that time on Instagram, not realizing just how true these words would be for her and her family. She would continue to share, with all who took an interest, the challenges of the road they were on. In an appearance on RP’s Real Talk podcast earlier this year, talking with Lucas Holtvluwer, Krystal explained that hospital stays brought their own problems. “She was born with Down Syndrome and a cardiac defect – pretty straightforward – but she has now encountered some medical complexities from living her life in a hospital this long and from delayed treatments.” One complication and delay led to another, and Veya was transferred from Hamilton’s McMaster Hospital to SickKids Hospital in Toronto, which is one of the leading children’s hospitals in the world. Crumbling care “Our journey started off really great, like we had teams that were really invested,” Krystal explained to Lucas. “But then we experienced her care declining January of this year, so that kind of set her on a totally different trajectory.” “Specifically with her last ICU admission, you could just tell through the conversations with the doctors that they were really just trying to wrap things up with her and kind of coerce us into letting her go rather than help her,” she shared on the podcast. “I feel like the team coach, trying to keep the spirits alive…. But they all just kind of vanished.” Krystal was particularly confused when Veya was denied a necessary liver transplant. She asked their Pediatric Advanced Care team if it was Veya’s Down Syndrome that was influencing their decision-making. “They can never say yes or no, but they said, ‘Mom, I think you know the answer to that deep down in your heart.’ And I said, ‘well, that is the confirmation.’” One particular incident really broke Krystal’s trust in Veya’s care. “Right after her liver surgery, she got RSV , and then a few days after that, she got overdosed with a lethal amount of potassium. It wasn't just a little bit, it was 10 times the regular amount that she normally gets, and it was during the evening when none of us were there.” Veya’s heart rate went to 350 beats per minute, and she had to be shocked three times to stabilize her. “I do have questions whether it actually was an accident or not, because these sorts of things happen when families step away. So, the timing of it, but also the amount. You know, it's one thing, if you gave a little extra, but 10 times the amount, like, an actual lethal dose?” Growing support Krystal shared the ups and downs of Veya’s journey on her Instagram account. Her photos, videos, and touching words lit a fire in many hearts around the world, and she ended up with close to 40,000 Instagram followers, many of whom were praying for Veya, and encouraging Krystal and her family. “For me, social media was like an open diary and a way for me to process but also a way for me to be able to connect with others that were raising children with Down Syndrome, because I knew nothing about it, and so it's been a really great place for resources and connecting.” But the care hasn’t only been virtual. Krystal and Jeremy are members of Trinity Canadian Reformed Church in Glanbrook, Ontario. And as she told Lucas back in July, “Our church community, they're phenomenal. I'll tell you this, we had a meal train set up for Veya when she was born, and we are 19 months into this and that same meal train is still going.” She added that the amount of support they have received allowed them to be fully present and to advocate for Veya, because everything else was being taken care of. The many prayers that were raised for their family carried them. “I don't think my husband and I really understood that till we lived this experience. Like you really feel carried by prayers. There's just this indescribable peace that comes with it.” Growing faith We read in James 1:3 how “the testing of your faith produces endurance” and Krystal attested to this when speaking about their journey prior to Veya’s death. “As much as we want to enter the next season of life and be off of this medical journey, there's a part of you that doesn't, because of the experience you have with God's nearness. Because it forces you to slow down and really lean into Him. “….The ways we've experienced God's goodness and care over these 19 months, we're forever thankful for that. Faith is not without pain. It's there to give you the courage to face it, right? And a lot of times this journey has really forced us to our knees.” She later added that, as hard as it has been, they have seen so much good come from this journey already, particularly with the many interactions with people in the hospital. Seeking justice After Veya’s promotion to glory, Krystal shared with Reformed Perspective that they hope to have further meetings with SickKids Hospital regarding the neglect that Veya experienced, which Krystal sees as a push to end Veya’s life rather than care for it. “What was happening was the team was trying to 'stealth euthanize' Veya through means of denying life-saving measures.” They are working with other families who experienced similar harms for their medically complex children at the same hospital, seeking to raise their concerns collectively. Her hope is to see a formal acknowledgement of harm, public reporting requirements, independent investigations, disability rights training, and whistleblower protection so that staff can report unsafe practices without fear of losing their jobs. Although she has devoted much of her past couple of years to being an advocate for Veya and others with disabilities, she also understands that she can only do so much. And that is OK. “Our God, The Creator of Life has the final say.” Advice for others When asked by RP what advice she would have for other families who may face similar situations, she urged them to document everything, including conversations and decisions, names, and copies of medical records. She also advised to never go into important meetings alone. Bring someone to witness and support you. Further, use clear and assertive language like “can you explain in writing why you are denying this treatment?” And if there are concerns, escalate them by asking to speak with a patient’s relations person or ombudsman, or even filing a complaint with the hospital leadership or licensing board. She encourages others to seek a second, or third opinion, and not be afraid to transfer care to another institution, even if it feels scary. And “trust your instincts – God gives them to us for a reason!” You know your child best so “if something feels wrong, it probably is.” Most soberly, she warns “know that Canada has become a death culture.” In an age where it has become legal to end the life of someone who requests it simply because they are suffering, it becomes all the more important to be on guard for the care of our loved ones, particularly those who are more vulnerable. “Instead of offering care, too many hospitals offer ‘comfort care only.’ Instead of fighting for life, they push families towards giving up and will blame you for your loved one’s suffering.” Her final advice is most encouraging. “You are not alone, God goes behind you and before you…. When you are battling the medical system for your child never forget to stop and ask God for guidance, strength, wisdom and peace. He sees, He knows, and He will lead you step by step.” A tribute for Veya In the weeks following Veya’s death, Krystal paid tribute to Veya with these words: “I didn’t have to look into your eyes to fall in love with you. I didn’t need to hear your soft, raspy cry to know you loved me too. I didn’t have to hold your hands to cherish you forever – because from the very beginning, within my womb, our hearts were already intertwined. “Veya, you changed me. Through you God gave me a deep perspective. You touched my soul and awakened a love so deep that can only be explained by His goodness. You gave me countless memories that I will hold close for the rest of my life. My heart aches in a way words can’t fully capture, and I know that ache won’t leave until we’re together again. …Though the longing never fades, each day moves me closer to the joy of holding you in Heaven.” Pictures used with permission of the Vanderbrugghens....

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A hill to die on

A couple of weeks ago, I attended a public lecture by Dr. Jordan Peterson at the University of Western Ontario. For those of you who don’t know, Dr. Peterson has found himself the target of transgender activists, some of whom actually claim that his refusal to use recently-invented “transgender pronouns” constituted violence. Labeling someone a perpetrator of violence for refusing to use the words you just made up, of course, also allows you to begin perpetrating real violence in response, and this has resulted in Peterson’s lectures being shut down by angry mobs. After the lecture, one student asked Peterson an interesting question. You’ve articulated at great length the dangers of post-modernism and political correctness, the student pointed out. But why this issue? Why choose transgender pronouns as the proverbial hill to die on? Peterson’s response was striking. “Why not?” he replied. When you’re fighting a war, there’s very rarely a compelling reason to die for the next yard of soil – but that’s how wars are won, and that is how the line is held – yard by yard. You have to pick something, and this is what I chose. His response reminded me of something I wrote about at length in my own book The Culture War: the tendency of Christians to count the cost and decide to opt out of fighting. Secular progressives are willing to fight a bloody war of attrition for every crimson inch of soil, from prayers at city council meetings to nativity scenes in public to launching cyber-lynch mobs on little old ladies who don’t want to bake cakes for gay weddings. Christians, on the other hand, often cave at the first sign of pressure. Douglas Wilson commented wryly on this habit on his blog in 2015: Whenever we get to that elusive and ever-receding “hill to die on,” we will discover, upon our arrival there, that it only looked like a hill to die on from a distance. Up close, when the possible dying is also up close, it kind of looks like every other hill. All of a sudden it looks like a hill to stay alive on, covered over with topsoil that looks suspiciously like common ground. So it turns out that surrendering hills is not the best way to train for defending the most important ones. Retreat is habit-forming. Now granted, as I’ve written before, Christians are often too busy raising their families and trying to live their lives to take a stand in the culture wars. For every baker or florist who gets targeted by gay rights activists, you can bet there are hundreds of others who quietly knuckled under to avoid becoming the center of a noisy lawsuit. But we need more men like Dr. Jordan Peterson. He may not be a Christian, but he is, as one writer so eloquently put it, “the frog that wouldn’t boil.” Each yard of ground we give up without a fight is another step closer to being backed into a corner. Dr. Peterson was willing to take a stand. He was willing to stop, look around, and say “Here. This is where I fight.” Each of us will have to make that decision sometime in the near future. And better now than later – it is easier to defend territory than it is to reclaim it. Jonathon Van Maren is the author of The Culture War and blogs at The theBridgehead.ca This article was first published in 2017....

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Why I don’t have a bucket list

Admittedly, to get guilt tripped into a camping trip exposes character weakness on my part. When someone bounds up to you, excited as a kitten encountering his first ball of yarn, and says they have the best idea for a geology fieldtrip, spanning 3 days (“ooh, ooh, no let’s turn it into 4!”), 400 miles, and something like 8 piles of rocks, any person with their wits about them would laugh and say, “Y’all have fun now, I’ll be over here, sleeping in my own bed.” People who camp on purpose, non-ironically, are an utter mystery to me. The more I learn about camping, the more outrageous and certifiable it seems! Did you know that KOA (one of the largest campground empires in the United States and yes, there is such a thing as a campground empire) stands for Kampgrounds of America?? How are we not promoting illiteracy and the overall degradation of our dignity by paying these people to borrow their dirt so we can sleep on it? Did you further know that after you have paid to sleep on dirt out in “nature,” you still are required to either buy or pack in your own wood for building campfires? In the (wait for it...) woods? Yet for the longest time during the diabolical planning of this trip, whose chief stated end was to go and stare at rocks, I could not bring myself to say “no, absolutely not, life is too short.” Which leads me to the character flaw, and my grandmother. ***** In the same week that this trip was scheduled to take place, I received word that my grandmother, my dad’s 94-year-old mother, had suffered a severe stroke. As I write this, I await further word on her condition; things didn’t look good last night. So I have been contemplating my grandmother, someone I have always found to be remarkable and not, perhaps, for the usual reasons. My grandmother was the quintessential farmwife. She raised four children, kept a lovely home, and was known for feeding people well. In many ways, I didn’t truly get to know her until I got married at age 20 and we both discovered that I shared her love of beautiful dishes, and of tables set to appeal to the senses. It was something she was teased about a bit over the years, her large collections of glassware, full sets of tableware, antique bowls and coffee service, but it has captivated me since childhood. She gave me my first everyday serving bowls when my oldest was a toddler – the same ones she used when her kids were little, and then proceeded to gift me antique glassware for my birthday for the next nearly 20 years. The year the glassware stopped was the same year she stopped calling on my birthday; that was, perhaps, the first time a birthday ever made me feel my age. I was blessed with 2 beautiful, intelligent farming grandmothers growing up; my mom’s mom went to the Lord a couple of years ago, and I like to think there are flavors of each of these women’s influences in my own farmwife homemaking. My maternal grandmother was known for ingenuity with the food at hand, with using her abundant garden to set visually peaceful tables, with the sort of minimalism that employs only that which is meaningful. My paternal grandmother was known for overflowing tables (why serve one kind of meat when you could serve three?), and for leftovers that could feed an army, created with simple recipes that everyone loved, served with what I find to be an uncommon blend of elegance and utility. She had no shame in making her mashed potatoes from a box, and paper napkins were a blessing. No one ever left her table hungry. I asked her once to teach me how she cooked various meats, how her meals always taste so good. She shrugged and said, “just a little salt and pepper?” As a person tempted by gourmet magazines, it was an important lesson for me. ***** And this, obviously, leads me to the ill-fated camping trip (not obvious, you say? We should spend more time together). The thing that guilted me into agreeing to this grand adventure of curiosity and literally leaving no stone unturned was the feeling that good mothers, or for that matter, that really interesting people, are the sort who long to travel the world, to always be experiencing new things. They are the ones who cannot simply read about a volcano, they have to climb it! At sunrise! And then go glissading down it, trying all the while to avoid hidden frozen lakes (you think I am making this up. Friend, I couldn’t make this stuff up. I refer you to your friendly neighborhood internet browser to prove the point)! How could I be worth anything at all if my bucket list was not perpetually on the verge of overflow? What does the truth – that I don’t even have a bucket list– say about me, about my value as a mother, as a wife, as a Christian? My grandmother has run well. She has lived an extraordinary life, and why? Because her life has been marked by extraordinary faithfulness to the task at hand. She has steadily built the portion of the kingdom wall God put in front of her. The pitfall I fell into was to believe that true faithfulness had to look different than embracing the life God has given me – it had to look both more “normal” and more exciting. I gave room to the lie that setting a gracious table was inferior to seeing something new, to having an adventure outside my own home. I am kicking myself as I write this... how could I have been so daft as to think that kicking rocks was more full of glory than grilling fresh corn on the cob, that sleeping on dirt had more inherent value than putting clean sheets on my family’s beds? Sitting here in the morning light, having removed myself from the geology fieldtrip, the truth of what it means to live well shines brightly before me. Only what’s done for Christ will last....

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Yea, all things

come not by chance but by His fatherly hand - Lord’s Day 10 ***** The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord. – Proverbs 16:33 The Heidelberg Catechism is both a confession and a summary of the doctrines of Scripture. The words of the Heidelberg can be easily understood, even though they convey the deep truths of the Bible. Two men, Zacharias Ursinus and Caspar Olevianus, were commissioned by Frederick the Pious (III), Protestant ruler and devout Calvinist, Elector Palatine of the Rhine (1559–76), to write this catechism for the people. Ursinus was a timid scholar, who preferred study to the limelight, and Olevianus was an eloquent preacher. Both were uniquely gifted and were providentially brought together by God to write the wonderful questions and answers in the Heidelberg. When our children were younger, my husband Anco and I spent much time in teaching them the Heidelberg Catechism. We considered Lord’s Day 10, dealing with the providence of God, an important section, and we took our time with its questions and answers. Question 27: What do you understand by the providence of God? Answer: God’s providence is His almighty and ever-present power, whereby, as with His hand, He still upholds heaven and earth and all creatures, and so governs them that leaf and blade, rain and drought, fruitful and barren years, food and drink, health and sickness, riches and poverty, indeed, all things, come to us not by chance but by His Fatherly hand. At the close of breakfast each morning, even at the risk of missing the school bus, we would recite the phrases in unison. These words were a spiritual intake that contained the past, the present and gave much confidence in the future. Odd but true The truth that God is totally in charge of all things, things that occur each day, has been a comfort throughout my life. There is a rather odd, and simultaneously humorous, story which I heard from my sister some forty or more years ago – a story which illustrates God’s providence. Because she is a truthful person, I believe it happened. It runs like this. A retired preacher was living out his days of retirement together with his wife in a two-story condo somewhere in the States. On Saturday mornings he was wont to take a bath in preparation for Sunday. One Saturday, as he was soaking in the tub, his wife let out a blood-curdling scream in the living room. It chilled him to the bone and he hopped out of his bath. In the altogether, he raced through the hall, into the living room, only to find his wife standing on a chair, totally upset. “What is it, Mary?” he asked, alarmed by her loss of composure. She pointed to the couch. “A snake,” she finally managed, “there is a snake under the couch.” “A snake?” he responded, slowly turning his head, searching the room. “Yes,” she went on, “I was watering the flowers and suddenly it crawled right by me and crept under the couch.” She again pointed to the couch. Cautiously Stan, the preacher, walked over and knelt down to take a peek. He couldn’t really see much as it was dark under the couch. As he was investigating, their dog came up behind him, nudging the pastor’s posterior with his cold nose. Thinking it was the snake, Stan promptly fainted, face-down, on the carpet. Mary, brave woman that she was, got down off the chair and hastened over to her husband. “Stan!” she called out, “Are you all right?” Stan, however, was out cold. Thinking that he’d suffered a heart attack, Mary ran to the phone and dialed for help, calling for an ambulance. The ambulance arrived just as Stan was recovering consciousness. Two men raced up the stairs, introduced themselves and skillfully maneuvered the pastor onto the stretcher they had brought with them. Gently and carefully covering him with a blanket, they took his blood pressure, finding it high. “Sir, it is possible you suffered a heart attack,” they explained, “and we’re just going to take you into emergency to make sure you are not in trouble.” Reassuring him and his wife in this way, they calmly carried him out of the room into the hallway. Standing at the top of the staircase, one of the two ambulance attendants began a slow descent, holding onto the foot end of the stretcher. The other man, also beginning to descend the stairs, suddenly dropped his carrying end. The snake, who had left the nether region of the couch, had quietly slithered into the hallway across his shoes. It startled the latter attendant to such a degree that he lost control over his end of the stretcher. Stan, the preacher, tumbled down the steps, breaking his left leg. The providence in this little story lies in the fact that two ambulance attendants were immediately on hand to give first aid to an aging preacher in a rather unfortunate, strange chain of events – events orchestrated by God. The attendants were there to help the preacher in his time of need as God intended. Our heavenly Father is One who not only sees everything beforehand, which is what providence essentially means, but He also brings about all He determines. Knowing and accepting the fact that God sees everything and brings events about can be a scary thought because it demonstrates that sinful man cannot hide anything from God. But providence is also comforting because it illustrates that God knows and cares for His people. God has us in the little things too Last week I had an unanticipated dental appointment. An infection in a bottom molar caused sudden and painful swelling in my left cheek. Resembling a chipmunk, I could barely open my mouth. The dentist immediately prescribed an antibiotic to take care of the infection. After the antibiotics had run their course, I had a second appointment – a consultation about what to do about a tooth that would very likely require an extraction. Like many people, I have anxiety, concern and wariness about sitting down in a dental chair. Yet, the morning of that second appointment my morning devotional had the heading of Psalm 81:10 which read: “I am the Lord your God, Who brought you up out of the land of Egypt. Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it.” Our God is a God of not just the things we consider huge in life, (such as cyclones and world wars), but also of the little things, the mundane and ordinary. The given text, prior to my dental appointment, made me grin. But the reality is that it also greatly strengthened and encouraged me. The truth of it is that we may be encouraged to ask God to bless us in all matters pertaining to our daily life. We may open our mouth as wide as we can and request whatever is needful. Spurgeon, in his Cheque Book of the Bank of Faith, gives the example of baby birds being fed by their parents. Squawking away, beaks open so wide you’d think they were going to split their little mouths, they are sustained. Spurgeon says: “God is ready to fill us if we are only ready to be filled. Let our needs make us open our mouths; let our faintness cause us to open our mouths and pant; yes, let our alarm make us open our mouths with a child’s cry. The opened mouth shall be filled by the Lord Himself. So be it unto us, O Lord, this day.”...

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