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Alice in Blunderland

“I can’t believe that!” said Alice. “Can’t you?” the Queen said in a pitying tone. “Try again: draw a long breath, and shut your eyes.” Alice laughed. “There’s no use trying,” she said: “one can’t believe impossible things.” “I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” – Based on “Alice in Wonderland” by Lewis Carroll (to whom I apologize for what follows …)

*****

As Alice rode in the carriage with the Queen through the streets of Blunderland, she couldn’t help but remark upon the carefree attitude of the people.

“Of course they’re optimistic and lighthearted,” sniffed the Queen, rather condescendingly, “And with good reason. Many of them have completely shelved the silly notion that there is a real God. Others who used to hold high positions in churches – when churches were still fashionable – managed, through various clever devices, to reduce their congregations to the point where Church doors had to be closed and property sold to other interests.

“But by far the greater part constitute those who have finally accepted the sublime principle of compromise – you know, those who found out how to mix what remained of their faith with secular ideologies so as to hammer out a lifestyle they could be comfortable with. Thanks to them we still have a church of sorts but one which can easily be controlled by an astute administrator such as myself!”

“But how on earth did all this happen?” cried Alice, aghast, “Isn’t this a Christian country?”

“It was,” remarked the Queen, “until enlightened theologians managed to take control of church courts and other key offices and substitute the gospel of Man for the Gospel of Christ. Then the people themselves, spoiled by an impossibly high standard of living which gave them everything and demanded nothing, were easily diverted down the broad road of liberalism. Final victory was assured, of course, when their morals degenerated past the point of no return.

“Still, I’m rather uneasy about a handful of diehards who, rumor has it, dare to insist that the Bible is of prime importance in the scheme of things – more important even than being politically correct! That is absurd, of course! As I understand it, they actually believe it to be God’s own Word. Anyway, they’re impeding real progress and need to be taught a sharp lesson. It may come sooner than they think!”

“That seems to be a rather harsh attitude,” said Alice in dismay. “Well, the best medicine isn’t always the tastiest,” snapped the Queen.

“Still, it does seem rather unfair,” murmured Alice. “Not at all,” said the Queen self righteously, “Look at the bulk of the people. You were the one who remarked on how carefree and contented they seem to be.” “That’s true,” admitted Alice. “But I don’t understand. Under the circumstances, I would have expected them to be just the opposite.”

“That’s because you know nothing about blunderthink,” announced the Queen imperiously. “In this land, the people don’t believe in pie-in-the-sky-by-and-by; they believe in social-evolution-in-the-here-and-now. They’re happy because they know that the more they perceive themselves as self-realizing people, the better off the world will be somewhere down the road.” “I see,” said Alice, but she didn’t really.

“I daresay they look at things differently in your country,” said the Queen disdainfully. “Quite,” said Alice humbly. “Well,” said the Queen, displaying more than her usual degree of tolerance, “what is the term you would use to describe the erosion of old-fashioned faith?”

“I don’t know very much about theology,” said Alice uncertainly, “but I believe it would be called apostasy.” “Exactly,” said the Queen triumphantly, “that’s just the kind of primitive reasoning one has come to expect from a foreigner these days! In Blunderland we are more intellectually astute. For example, when we were faced with what you call ‘apostasy’, we simply redefined its apparent heresies as a victory over narrow sectarianism.”

“But how can that be?” asked Alice, now thoroughly confused. “By applying the basic principles of blunderthink,” explained the Queen, barely disguising her contempt. “In essence, blunderthink is a form of mental discipline by which we are enabled to rise above mere facts, through the application of selective moral reasoning. If, for instance, we choose to consider sin as a triumph over excessive religiosity rather than rebellion against God, and convey this idea to the people through every means at our disposal; and if we consistently scoff at the ‘traditional’ Biblical definition and those who take it, the people will soon begin to come around to our viewpoint. Now, if the majority accepts something we tell them, why then it’s true, isn’t it?” “In politics it seems to be true,” said Alice carefully, “but I’m not as sure about religion.”

“Very well then, let me give you another example,” said the Queen doggedly. “No doubt in your country when Christians are inclined to follow current, popular trends rather than the teachings of the Bible, you assume they’re compromising the faith.”

“Of course,” said Alice. “Nonsense!” said the Queen testily. “Here in Blunderland we would simply construe the acceptance of current trends as part and parcel of getting on with the Christian mandate.” “And the people would believe it?” blurted Alice, astonished.

“Certainly they would believe it!” snorted the Queen, “if we told it to them often enough and their scholars and theologians were more terrified of being out of step with the times than with God. The fact is, they unhesitatingly champion every popular viewpoint these days, particularly if it contradicts what used to be held as plain Biblical teaching! Why? Because they yearn to be recognized as intellectuals rather than ‘primitives’ – it’s the nametag that scares them!”

“I think I’m beginning to understand,” said Alice, “blunderthink is what is called brain-washing in my country.” “How dare you?” shrieked the Queen, “Off with her head!!” But the guards were used to the Queen’s tantrums and wearily reminded her that capital punishment in Blunderland, even for the most monstrous crimes, was a thing of the past. “I’m sorry,” said the Queen, when she had regained her composure, “I can’t bear to be contradicted.”

“Well then,” said Alice, trying to remember what the Queen had told her, “let me see if I understand it correctly. Apostasy is simply a victory over narrow sectarianism. Sin is triumph over excessive religiosity. Current social mores are simply a new way of expressing the Christian mandate. Is that it?”

“Dear girl,” said the Queen, “that’s just the beginning of blunderthink – it’s such an adaptable concept. Let me run a few more ideas past you. For instance, when Christians embrace other religions as equal inheritors with Christianity, this broader-based faith will have much more political whack than any single religious organization ever had before. And when all belief systems are joined into one ecumenical World-Church, religion will indeed be a formidable force to reckon with. More importantly, when the brotherhood-of-all-men concept finally gains universal acceptance, wars will cease and we will finally have succeeded in the ambition of the ages – bringing the Kingdom of God into being through our own efforts!”

“Bringing the Kingdom of God into being through our own efforts,” echoed Alice. “That’s wonderful! Why, all of society’s problems could be solved this way, not just religious ones. Think of the time and effort that could be saved by looking at everything the blunderthink way … Immorality is moral. Poverty is wealth. Sickness is health. Hell is heaven. Death is life and … socialism is the Kingdom of God. Why, there’s a positive side to everything!”

“You’re on to something big, young lady,” smiled the Queen fondly. And giving Alice a conspiratorial pat on the knee, she confided, “I’ll convene Cabinet right away and get the show on the road!”

..BUT the Lord said, “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! … Which justify the wicked for reward, and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him! Therefore as the fire devoureth the stubble, and the flame consumeth the chaff, so their root shall be as rottenness, and their blossom shall go up as dust: because they have cast away the law of the LORD of hosts, and despised the word of the Holy One of Israel.” – Isa 5:20,23,24

Folks, the ‘show’ isn’t destined to make it very far down the road…

Bruce Pringle is a member of the Reformed Presbyterian Church in Smith Falls, Ontario.
This was published in the July/August 1999 issue

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The slippery slope is real

Some weeks ago I wrote a piece about a San Francisco pastor, Fred Harrell, who had recently attacked the doctrine of penal substitutionary atonement. In doing so, I made a connection between Harrell's prior shifts  – first, adopting the ordination of women and, second, endorsing homosexual relations – and his most recent movement away from the clear teaching of God's Word. My conclusion was to posit this as evidence of a slippery slope, further noting that in our cultural moment the slippery slope is usually entered at the point of ordaining women to office in the church. It would be an understatement to observe that this post touched a raw nerve for some readers. (One well-known pastor wrote me privately to accuse me of being schismatic. It is a feature of our times, I am afraid, that to defend the consensus on which we have built unity is to be labeled as divisive.) Of the different reactions one that most surprised me was a denial that there is validity to the idea of slippery slopes. My initial response to this criticism is to marvel that people can take this position in light of recent church history. Still, the topic is important enough that I think it good to defend the reality of the slippery slope. Why is the slope slippery? First, let me define what I mean in referring to the slippery slope. The slippery slope simply notes that those who remove the restraint against worldly conformity place themselves in peril of further and more damaging accommodations. The slope becomes slippery when the source of friction is removed. Far from the logical fallacy of which it is charged, there is a logical basis for the slippery slope argument: when the authority of Scripture is yielded to cultural demands, the loss of that authority renders us vulnerable to further cultural demands. Herein lies the wisdom of Scripture: "If the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?" (Ps. 11:3). Indeed, the very first Psalm begins with a portrayal of the slippery slope, charting a progression from "the counsel of the wicked" to "the way of sinners" and ultimately to "the seat of scoffers" (Ps. 1:1). That it’s slippery doesn’t mean everyone slides In making these observations, I do not mean that anyone who changes his or her view in the direction of cultural preferences is irrevocably bound to further concessions. It is blessedly true that people and churches have taken a perilous step to the left (or right) and later reconsidered, and to note examples of this happening does not prove that their previous action had not been imperiled. It is because the slippery slope can be escaped by recommitting to Scripture that warnings of peril are of value. Moreover, I do not mean to suggest that those who make any concessions to culture over Scripture have already abandoned the atonement of Christ. I am suggesting, however, that the slippery slope is...well, slippery. Those who remove traction from their feet may very well slide much further than they first thought possible. As Fred Harrell's progression illustrates – together with those of the PC(USA), CRC, RCA, Church of Scotland, and other denominations – the abandonment of clear biblical teaching at one cultural pressure-point (women's ordination), imperils us with further capitulations (homosexual acceptance), and if unchecked will find itself challenged to avoid "touching the Jesus Box" (i.e. denying even the resurrection of our Savior). It starts with women’s ordination Second, I noted that in our time, the slippery slope is usually entered at the point of women's ordination. This tendency is not surprising, since the assault of secular culture against the Bible is most tenaciously focused on gender and sexuality. To uphold biblical gender norms, including the Bible's clear teaching on male-only ordination is the single most inflammatory position that Christians may hold in our culture. For this reason, it is hard to find an example in recent history when a Christian leader or church denomination moved from biblical conservatism to unbiblical cultural conformity when the slide did not begin with the ordination of women to church office. It stands to reason, then, that we should avoid thinking that we can conform to the worldly demands regarding gender and avoid further accommodations of greater significance. What about women deacons? This brings me to the topic of women deacons. Several critics accused me of asserting that to support the ordination of women to the office of deacon is to abandon the gospel. This response is noteworthy because I made no mention of women deacons in my original post. I will admit, however, to being unpersuaded that the move to ordain women deacons in the PCA is unrelated to a broader agenda of cultural accommodation. In saying this, I do not mean to question the sincerity of those individuals who advocate the position that women should hold the office of deacon. But I would note the growing tendency among these same persons to employ women in roles that are as associated with the office of elder. For example, in many churches pastored by ministers who are supportive of the ordination of women deacons, women are placed in the pulpit during worship services for the public reading of Scripture and to offer the congregational prayer. Women are assigned to distribute the elements of the Lord's Supper. These are functions associated with the office of elders, not deacons. Moreover, word has recently come that pressure is being exerted in one PCA presbytery to install a woman as its stated clerk, making her a member of a court composed exclusively of ruling and teaching elders. Where is the outcry against these tendencies from those who say that they are only wishing to ordain women as deacons? Conclusion The slippery slope, then, is real. And the sole restraint against it – against all our sin and tendency to compromise – is our obedience to the voice of the Spirit of Christ speaking in Holy Scripture. Therefore, the counsel given by Jeremiah at another moment of cultural of peril seems urgent: Stand by the crossroads, and look and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls (Jer. 6:16). In this way alone will we navigate the perils of our times, fortifying our fidelity to Christ. This article was originally published in the Sept/Oct 2017 issue of the magazine. Rev. Richard D. Phillips has been the Senior Minister of Second Presbyterian Church in Greenville, South Carolina (PCA) since July 2007. A version of this article first appeared on Alliance for Confessing Evangelical’s Reformation 21 blog under the title “Standing Firm on the Slippery Slope.” It has been reprinted here with permission....

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