You are not enough (and that’s okay)

by Allie Beth Stuckey
2020 / 208 pages

In today’s culture, women often encounter myths promoting the belief that genuine happiness is attainable through self-love and autonomy. Social media platforms like Pinterest and Instagram frequently showcase quotes urging women to embrace their supposed perfection and view self-love as the ultimate path to fulfillment. Allie Beth Stuckey’s book, You’re Not Enough (And That’s Okay), fearlessly confronts these myths from a Christian standpoint, emphasizing the significance of discovering true contentment through Jesus rather than the pursuit of selfish ambitions.

Dismantling 5 myths

Stuckey dismantles five prevalent myths perpetuated by the culture of self-love:

• You are enough
• You determine your truth
• You’re perfect the way you are
• You’re entitled to your dreams
• You can’t love others until you love yourself

Drawing from her Christian testimony, she exposes the emptiness that arises from relying on oneself for happiness, recounting her struggle with a failed college relationship leading to a season of partying and disordered eating.

Christ, not you

Living in a culture that constantly affirms self-worth, conveying the message that one is a sinner in need of redemption through Christ provides a counter-narrative. Stuckey adeptly navigates this cultural landscape, highlighting the inherent discontent and feelings of inadequacy resulting from the pursuit of self-love.

In the chapter “You’re perfect the way you are,” Stuckey asserts that one is “not perfect the way you are, and you will never be.” She explains that Scripture reveals two kinds of selves: the old self, utterly depraved and seeking love and satisfaction in the wrong places, and the new self, redeemed by Christ and free from the bonds of sin. Accepting the secular narrative of “you’re perfect the way you are” means that instead of relying on Christ’s perfection, we’d be relying on our own, embracing ourselves instead of Him.

Stuckey also addresses the Church’s susceptibility to the allure of the self-love culture. She reminds readers that Jesus’ commandment to love others as oneself is not an endorsement of self-love. Rather, Jesus understands that “self-love” is inherent, born out of looking out for our own interests. Stuckey cites Philippians 2:3-4, teaching that we should consider others’ interests more important than our own.

The book concludes with a poignant reminder that while self-love depletes, God’s love is enduring. Stuckey highlights the profound and eternal nature of God’s love, contrasting it with the superficial and temporary nature of self-love.

In summary, You’re Not Enough (And That’s Okay) provides a much-needed Christian perspective in a culture saturated with self-love.