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How to be happier

Keep long lists, and short accounts

*****

As I pad down the hallway to my home office, sometimes I’ll look down and remember that the laminate planking I’m walking on was laid down with the help of friends. I’m not the best with a hammer or saw, so while I did some of the sweating, my friends brought the skill. I was so very thankful at the time, and now whenever I remember it’s a warm feeling still.

As of late I’ve been remembering these friends more often because of a curious book. It’s about a guy who set out to personally thank every person involved in getting him his morning brew. There’s the barista, of course, but a farmer had to grow the beans, and then there’s all the people in between – it turns out there are an astonishing number of people involved in a simple cup of coffee. Who picks the blend? How many are involved in the actual roasting? Someone had to design the lid (there’s quite some engineering to it), and then there’s the coffee cup sleeve – there wasn’t always a sleeve – and when we remember that coffee is about 1 percent beans and 99 percent water, then there’s a whole municipal water department to thank too. And who makes the pipes that carry the water? We haven’t even gotten into the boats and trucks involved and all the crews who man and make them.

A long list to be thankful for

This guy wanted to personally thank everyone involved but quickly realized that might amount to millions. So he narrowed it down to the one thousand most directly involved.

G.K. Chesterton said that, “When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude,” and this book was an eye-opener for just how many blessings I’ve been taking for granted. If thousands – millions – are involved in making a cup of coffee, how many could I thank for everything I find even on my short journey from bed to shower each morning? How many designers, engineers, miners, and factory workers were involved in making the Kindle that wakes us up each morning? And what about our bedding, the bedroom carpet, bathroom tiles and that long-shower necessity, our tankless water heater? I normally clomp past it all, but I could choose to start each day just looking around in amazement. As Chesterton reminds us, “gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.”

The author of this book is a sometimes-blasphemous atheist (which is why I’m not sharing his name - I don’t want to promote him) but even as an atheist he recognizes that his disposition to grumpy ingratitude isn’t good… for him.

“…gratitude is the single-best predictor of well-being and good relationships, beating out twenty-four other impressive traits such as hope, love, and creativity. As the Benedictine monk David Steindl-Rast says, ‘Happiness does not lead to gratitude. Gratitude leads to happiness.’”

But why is thankfulness next to joyfulness? He doesn’t seem to know, but we do. God created us to glorify Him and then gave us innumerable reasons to do just that. And because He loves us, He so fashioned mankind that when we do what we were made to do, it is good for us. And He’s so gracious that even when we do a half measure, thanking the people around us, but forgetting the God Who made us, it is good for us still.

Sometimes we need a Jordan Peterson or Elon Musk – someone outside the Church – to remind us of what we have, and what unbelievers don’t. I was struck by that here, when this author shared,

“…I’ll occasionally start a meal by thanking a handful of people who helped get our food to the plate. I’ll say, ‘Thank you to the farmer who grew the carrots, to the truck driver who hauled them, to the cashier at Gristedes grocery story who rang me up.’”

This fellow is “praying” to people he knows will never hear him because he feels such a need to express gratitude. To quote Chesterton again, “The worst moment for an atheist is when he is really thankful and has no one to thank.” When I look around the dinner table at the food that’s there once again, and the family gathered around, and when I really stop to think of all I’ve been given here, my heart can’t help but swell, but now there’s another blessing I can bring to my giving, loving Father – I can thank God that I can thank God!

Keeping short accounts

But if Christians have so much to be thankful for, why aren’t we more joyful? Why am I too often grumpy, sullen, and short to the people God has gifted me?

Part of it is that we take so much for granted. We easily forget what we have, so there’s something to keeping a thankful journal. Around Thanksgiving each year my wife gets some notecards and encourages us each day to draw something we’re grateful for, and then we put the cards up on the hallway wall. It’s quite the display by month’s end.

But even more of it is taking for granted the biggest gift we’ve been given: forgiveness.

In his booklet How to Maintain Joy in Your Life, Jim Wilson shares how, upon his conversion, he experienced joy liked he’d never had chasing after the world’s substitutes. But as this Navy midshipman set out on his Christian journey, he found that joy diminishing. And it continued diminishing for the next three years. Sitting in the stateroom of an American destroyer stationed in the Sea of Japan, he was struck that for the 3 years since his conversion he hadn’t really been confessing his sins. Oh, sure, he’d confessed some sins, but there were many he hadn’t taken to God for all sorts of reasons. When he confessed his sins, God forgave him, and once again he started feeling that same joy.

Guilt is a weight. But, thanks to Jesus, it’s one we don’t have to carry. Guilt is also God’s way of getting our attention. As it says in Hebrews 12:11:

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

Jim Wilson was trained by that discipline, but like the rest of us, he was a slow learner.

“I would again disobey, get disciplined, and lose my joy. This time, instead of not confessing, I would confess after a while… ten hours, a week, 2 weeks.”

Eventually he realized that he didn’t have to wait to confess his sins – he could “keep short accounts.” Then, instead of a series of ups when he was forgiven, and downs when he wouldn’t go to God (or at least not yet), he started to experience ongoing joy.

“Sometimes I went for a while before confessing, but generally I would confess right away or within a couple of hours. I’m not saying I have not sinned in those years…. But I have a low tolerance for discipline. I do not like it. As long as I am unrepentant, the discipline stays on me, the hand of the Lord is heavy. I can remove the discipline of the Lord by repenting now.”

For those of us who’d prefer to stay miserable, he concludes his booklet with a list of what you can do instead of confessing your sin. You can justify, excuse, or hide it. You can blame someone else, procrastinate, or stand on pride. A favorite for many is “generalization,” where you readily admit “mistakes were made” without really getting into the dirt of what you did. But tricking yourself doesn’t trick God, and you can’t enjoy Him if you are hiding from Him.

Conclusion

If you want to be happier, it isn’t complicated.

Open your eyes wide, and see the world as it really is. There are troubles, but then there is God, and He continues to bless us beyond any measuring. And the biggest of those blessings is that we can know for certain – we can count on Him – that when we come to our Father with our sins, He will always and forever forgive.

That’s got me a little verklempt but I can assure you, they are happy tears.



News

Saturday Selections – Jan. 11, 2025

Music as the fingerprints of God (6 min)

George Steiner here is lecturing on the wonder of music and is not trying to argue that music points us to God. But he does believe it points us beyond materialism – our response to music shows that we are more than what we are made of.

" speaks to us that there is something else which, paradoxically, belongs to us profoundly but somehow touches on a universal meaning and possibility that we are not only an electrochemical and neuro-physiological assemblage; that there is more in consciousness than electronic wiring."

Evolution can't explain eggs

This is a bit of a technical one, but even if you get only the gist, you'll understand just how amazing the seemingly simplest things around us really are. It's only because we take God's engineering for granted that we can overlook the wonder that is an egg shell.

Evolution has to explain how they could come to be in some step-by-step evolutionary process? As if.

Trudeau is gone, so who is going to replace him?

The Liberals are about to run a leadership campaign, but have this worry:

"One of the key concerns that is out there is that the party could be prone to something approaching a takeover, or could be prone to a lot of people who don't give a hoot about the Liberal party who might be termed single-interest activists signing up and having a very real impact on the selection of our next leader."

Is anyone plotting a pro-life takeover? Should we be?

Abortion was the leading cause of death worldwide in 2024. And it wasn't even close.

45 million unborn babies were aborted last year – so relayed Jonathon Van Maren. That number is more than the population of all of Canada.

In the US abortion accounts for 60% of all African American deaths.

To put this number in a different context, COVID killed approximately 7 million in total over 4 years and in response we shut down the world. Six times more die each year from abortion and no notice is paid.

Who will stand up for the unborn? Will you? Will any politician? Will you vote for a politician who won't?

The danger of being a sermon critic

As Tim Challies explains, if you focus on what you think should have been there, you run the risk of missing the fruit that is there.

Amazing information packed inside you (12 min)

This video makes the point your DNA coding is more incredible than even the most complicated computer code, but it also kind of reduces us to just that information.... as if we could make a human if we only managed this same level of programming. So, as you watch, recall that we are more than our matter, being both body and an immaterial, eternal soul.

 


Today's Devotional

January 14 - Power over fear

“Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.” - Luke 12:32 

Scripture reading: Luke 12:22-34

So many in the world today begin this New Year with fear in their hearts. This life and the things of this world are all they care about and all they have. Consequently, they're afraid that their life might be >

Today's Manna Podcast

Manna Podcast banner: Manna Daily Scripture Meditations and open Bible with jar logo

Jesus' work continues: Acts

Serving #722 of Manna, prepared by William Den Hollander, is called "Jesus' work continues" (Acts).













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Book Reviews, Children’s fiction

In Aunt Lucy's Kitchen

by Cyntia Rylant 1998 / 56 pages Three nine-year-old cousins are staying with their Aunt Lucy, and wondering what sort of fun they can cook up. When Lily comes up with the idea of a cookie company, Rosie and Tess are quickly on board. And all it takes to convince their Aunt is the promise of some free Cinamon Crinkles, her favorite. It's this enthusiasm, right from the start, that most appeals in this "Cobble Street Cousins" series. All 6 books are low on the drama – no fights or conflict – but high on the creativity, with the three girls always eager to build on each other's ideas. Lily is the writer, so she composes a poem to help them advertise their cookies: Cookies to your door, Who could ask for more, Aunt Lucy's girls will bake for you Cinnamon Crinkles, sweet and true Call us for a Baker's dozen We'll bring them over with no fussin! This is just the first of Lily's works, and while not her best (one of the others prompted my youngest to blurt out, "That was a really good poem!") it gets the word out. And then the orders start a'coming! Their first delivery is to a young man stuck on his couch with his leg in a cast. The outgoing Tess just has to know how it happened, and before long the girls have learned the man's name (Michael) and his occupation (he studies plants), and they find out that he has visited their aunt's flower shop but been too shy to really talk with her. That, of course, gets the girls thinking, and before long they've figured out a way to have the two of them meet: the girls will have a performance and invite the neighborhood! There are 5 others in this Cobble Street Cousins series, all just as sweet. They are, in order: In Aunt Lucy's Kitchen A Little Shopping Special Gifts Some Good News Summer Party Wedding Flowers In #4, the girls start their own newspaper, which got my middlest doing so as well. She described the whole series as "inspiring." Cautions The one caution concerns the cousins' parents, or more specifically, their absence. Whether it is Peter Pan, Frozen, or The Green Ember, a common theme in kids' stories is for the parents to be conveniently out of the way. That's because it will be harder for children to have big adventures if their big folk are still around to keep them safe. Sometimes the absence is because the parents are dead (Pollyanna) or desperate times have required desperate measures (WWII bombings in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe). But in the Cobble Street Cousins series, the three girls are with their aunt because their parents are professional dancers doing a year-long tour. My kids didn't notice that this was a lame reason to leave your kids behind for a year... but I wanted them to notice because this is the "career over kids" misplaced priority that the world is so often pitching. To disarm it, we need to be able to recognize it. In addition, Tess only has a mom, and her dad's complete absence – no explanation is offered as to whether her dad is dead, or her parents are divorced – is odd. Conclusion While these will only appeal to girls (girls read boy books, but a boy wouldn't dare be caught reading a book about three girl cousins!), they most certainly will appeal. And at between 56 and 72 pages long, these are a nice digestible size for Grades 2 through 4. I'll also note that our family really enjoyed them as a bedtime read – the Cobble Street cousins are gentle, happy girls, who will inspire pleasant dreams! Cyntia Rylant has also authored the absolutely wonderful "Mr. Putter and Tabby" series, which, if you haven't checked it out already, you really should. Find my review here....

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Articles, Book Reviews, Children’s picture books

Mr Putter & Tabby: 25 sweet stories

by Cynthia Rylant illustrated by Arthur Howard 44 pages / 1994-2016 It's always fun to find a children's book that is interesting enough for parents to read repeatedly without getting too bored. And it is an absolute treasure when you can find an entire series of such books! Cynthia Rylant's Mr. Putter and Tabby books – 25 in all – are exactly that sort. Mr. Putter is an older retired man with an older, quite sedentary cat named Tabby. And next door, they have a wonderful neighbor, Mrs. Teaberry, who has a "good" dog named Zeke. They go on the sort of adventures that older people do – a boat ride, a cooking class, painting the porch – and their two pets help liven things up. These are quiet, sweet stories that will have you and your child smiling throughout. My wife and I enjoyed reading them to our then three-year-old, who was only disappointed with one story, but that was because I told her it was the one "where Mr. Putter and Mrs. Teaberry finally get married." She was very sad to discover I was just joking – this perfect couple hasn't yet become an official couple. We are still hoping, though! I would recommend these for the 3-9 year-old age group. They are great books for parents to read to both pre-school and even elementary-age children because parents and children will enjoy them. And they are very fun books for children who are just learning to read to tackle by themselves. I've included short reviews of all 25 titles. There's no real order to them, except maybe the first two. Those would be best to read in order at the start. I would highly recommend the whole series, with just one caution. Mr. Putter and Tabby Take the Train has this elderly couple flouting a "no pets" rule – not the best example in a book for young children – but that is the exception to a series that's full of charm and warmth. 1. Mr. Putter and Tabby Pour the Tea Mr. Putter has some wonderful English muffins he would love to share, but no one to share them with. And when he goes to the pet store looking for a cat, all he finds are kittens, far too full of energy. But when he visits the animal shelter, Mr. Putter finds a cat who's certainly not overly energetic. Tabby's joints creak, her fur is thinning, and she seems a bit deaf in one ear... just like Mr. Putter! It's a wonderful match! 2. Mr. Putter and Tabby Walk the Dog This marks the first appearance of Mr. Putter's wonderful neighbor Mrs. Teaberry. When she slips on a kiwi (the fruit, not the bird) and twists her ankle, soft-hearted Mr. Putter quickly volunteers to walk Mrs. Teaberry's dog, Zeke. But Zeke is no model dog – for Mr. Putter he is a nightmare! At least until Mr. Putter and Zeke have a man-to-dog talk! 3. Mr. Putter and Tabby Bake the Cake Mrs. Teaberry inexplicably loves fruitcake. Or, at least, Mr. Putter finds it inexplicable. For Christmas, Mr. Putter decides he wants to make her a cake that won't hurt her foot if she drops it. But he has never made a cake before! Another sweet story about this wonderful elderly couple. 4. Mr. Putter and Tabby Pick the Pears Mr. Putter loves Fall because that's when he can pick the juicy pears from his tree and make pear jelly. But this year Mr. Putter's cranky legs aren't cooperating – he can't make it up his ladder to pick them. But that isn't enough to stop this inventive senior. Mr. Putter remembers how, as a kid, he used a slingshot to knock things down. He fashions his sling, takes careful aim at his pear tree, and gives it a go. It turns out, however, that his slingshot is much more powerful than he thought, and Mr. Putter spends the next several hours launching apples high, high, high into the air, until they disappear over his house. Great fun... though it does nothing to get his pears down. And it leaves him without any apples too! Fortunately, Mrs. Teaberry comes to the rescue. 5. Mr. Putter and Tabby Row the Boat On this very hot summer day, Mr. Putter figures out a great way to stay cool. He takes Tabby, and his neighbor Mrs. Teaberry, and her good dog Zeke, out on the lake. And on an island in the middle, they eat their lunch and he and Mrs. Teaberry share "tall tales" from their lives. This is the first book that had me hoping the author would soon write "Mr. Putter & Tabby Pop the Question." 6. Mr. Putter and Tabby Fly the Plane  Mr. Putter may be old, but he still loves toys (even though he knows he isn't supposed to anymore). In this adventure, Mr. Putter and Tabby enjoy flying a radio-controlled toy plane... and give it to someone who enjoys it even more. 7. Mr. Putter and Tabby Take the Train What could be better than going on a train ride? The only problem, it turns out, is that trains don't allow pets. But this rule is bypassed when Mr. Putter backs Zeke into a backpack, and Mrs. Teaberry carries Tabby on the train in a picnic basket. One caution: This focuses on how to cleverly get around rules. So, if I was getting a dozen of this series for my school library, I'd give this one a miss. But I might still take it out of my public library and then, while reading it to my girls, teach them that even such wonderful old folks can misstep now and again. 8. Mr. Putter and Tabby Toot the Horn Mrs. Teaberry decides that since she and Mr. Putter like music so much, they should be in a band. But what sort of band can they be in, since neither knows how to play an instrument? 9. Mr. Putter and Tabby Paint the Porch Mr. Putter's porch is looking a little shabby. But when he gets out the pink paint, a squirrel decides he might want to help. Soon little pink paw prints are everywhere! Fortunately, Mr. Putter has a wonderful neighbor, Mrs. Teaberry, who is happy to help him clean up the mess. 10. Mr. Putter and Tabby Feed the Fish Mr. Putter and Tabby both love visiting the fish store. But when Mr. Putter brings three goldfish home, Tabby starts having troubles – he can't stop watching them! However Mrs. Teaberry is once again able to help. How nice it is for Mr. Putter and Tabby to have such a wonderful neighbor! 11. Mr. Putter and Tabby Catch the Cold "When Mr. Putter was a boy, he had almost liked colds. He always got spoiled." But now that he's old, it's not good to have a cold – there's no one to spoil him! Or is there? Mrs. Teaberry and her good dog Zeke make sure that this is "the best cold Mr. Putter ever caught." 12. Mr. Putter and Tabby Stir the Soup Mr. Putter and Tabby both love soup, but there always seems to be something stopping them from making it: either they don't have the onions, or the beans, or the macaroni. And then, when they finally have all the ingredients, their trusty stove decides not to work. But no worries – Mrs. Teaberry would be happy to let them use her stove. And, of course, Zeke won't be a bother, right? One caution offered: Mr. Putter says "Jiminy!" at one point, which some regard as a mild expletive. 13. Mr. Putter and Tabby Write the Book When a snowstorm keeps him indoors, Mr. Putter decides to become a mystery writer. He soon discovers there is a lot of preparation involved in getting ready to write – snacks don't just fix themselves! When Mr. Putter's writing strays from mysteries and towards the many good things he sees all around him, Mr. Putter is a bit discouraged... until Mrs. Teaberry cheers him up! 14. Mr. Putter and Tabby Make a Wish With a shock, Mr. Putter realizes that today is his birthday, and while he thinks he's too old for cake, candles, and presents, he still wants a celebration. So he calls up Mrs. Teaberry. She is happy to come over... but she first needs to do some chores. While Mr. Putter waits, increasingly impatient, Mrs. Teaberry is preparing a surprise! One caution offered: Mr. Putter says, "Good heavens!" 15. Mr. Putter and Tabby Spin the Yarn Mrs. Teaberry is a very good neighbor and also a cook and a baker who loves to share her culinary creations with Mr. Putter. But Mr. Putter has started to wonder if he's a good neighbor – what does he do for her? So he decides to do something nice by serving tea to Mrs. Teaberry's knitting club. But being a good neighbor turns out to be quite a bit harder than Mr. Putter thought! 16. Mr. Putter and Tabby See the Stars Mrs. Teaberry likes to feed Mr. Putter. And Mr. Putter likes to be fed by Mrs. Teaberry. But one night he so enjoys himself that he doesn't notice just how many of her jelly rolls he has eaten. Later that night he does notice – his grumbling tummy won't let him sleep. So he and Tabby go for a walk in their neighborhood. And who do they meet? Mrs. Teaberry! It seems her good dog Zeke also had too many jelly rolls, and his tummy wouldn't let him sleep either. Mr. Putter and Mrs. Teaberry tell each other "stories in the moonlight. They told secrets. They make each other laugh." This is another sweet, simple story that will have you rooting for Mr. Putter to get down on one arthritic knee. 17. Mr. Putter and Tabby Run the Race With Mrs. Teaberry's encouragement, Mr. Putter enters a seniors' race. And, with the help of Mrs. Teaberry's good dog Zeke, Mr. Putter runs quite a race! 18. Mr. Putter and Tabby Spill the Beans Mrs. Teaberry is very good at coming up with new things for her and Mr. Putter to do. Of course, sometimes these new things don't work out. But they are always an adventure. This time around Mrs. Teaberry wants the two of them to take a cooking class: one hundred ways to cook beans! To Mr. Putter this doesn't sound like it will be much of an adventure. "But he wanted to make Mrs. Teaberry happy." Fortunately, Tabby and Zeke are able to turn this into an adventure after all. 19. Mr. Putter and Tabby Clear the Decks Mr. Putter thinks that Mrs. Teaberry is a genius when she decides they should have an adventure on a sightseeing boat. But as much as Mr. Putter likes the boat, Zeke likes it even more. When he decides he doesn't want to leave, it is up to the boat's captain to talk Mrs. Teaberry's good dog into letting go of the mast. 20. Mr. Putter and Tabby Ring the Bell Mr. Putter gets all nostalgic about school and arranges to visit a first-grade classroom. And Tabby and Zeke arrange to make this a very memorable visit! 21. Mr. Putter and Tabby Dance the Dance Mr. Putter may have two left feet, but Mrs. Teaberry thinks he is a wonder! I wonder when he is going to ask her to marry him! 22. Mr. Putter and Tabby Drop the Ball Mr. Putter decides that, as fun as napping is, they really need to take up a sport. He finds his old baseball glove and calls up Mrs. Teaberry, who knows just the right team to join, where one of the players is 100 years old! No one is very fast... except Zeke. Oh, Zeke, put down the ball! 23. Mr. Putter and Tabby Turn the Page Mr. Putter loves to read out loud, and Tabby loves to listen. When the library invites patrons to come "Read aloud to your pet at Story Time" Mr. Putter decides to go. But he makes a mistake. He tells Mrs. Teaberry. She loves new things, so she wants to do it too. But Zeke in a library? 24. Mr. Putter and Tabby Smell the Roses Mrs. Teaberry's birthday is just around the corner: what can Mr. Putter and Tabby get her? She likes her garden, so Mr. Putter decides to take her to the Conservatory. But can Zeke behave himself in the midst of so many flowers and plants? Well, no, and suddenly the bananas and lemons are flying everywhere. But even after the rambunctious mutt gets them all booted out, that doesn't put a damper on the celebrations. Mrs. Teaberry even manages to make lemonade out of the lemons. 25. Mr. Putter and Tabby Hit the Slopes While this isn't the happy conclusion to the series that we were hoping for – Mr. Tabby and Mrs. Teaberry are still only neighbors – it is another fun episode. This time Mr. Putter is a bit tired of winter and needs a little excitement. He remembers the sledding he used to do as a boy, and just knows his adventurous neighbor is bound to have some toboggans!...